HEALING WAYS ENCYLOPŒDIA
Self-Help Ways for Healing the World
Copyright UN-Inma All rights reserved. May be copied with acknowledgement for non-profit purposes.
Written from 1993 onwards. Last Updated April 2014.
Note: any word or expression marked with a (*) is earmarked for further discussion.
The wisdom in this extensive Encyclopaedia has been drawn from the grassroots people of the East Asia Oceania Australasia Region. Consistent with their way, this wisdom is freely available on this page for non profit purposes.
A Starting Place: Living – Mini Awareness Experiences for transforming from existing to Living
PLAYING WITH POSSIBILITIES
You may want to play with these ideas and incorporate them into what's already happening.
There is a mass of ideas in this page. Everything is in alphabetical order.
Clicking the cursor on the words in blue will allow you to jump to where that concept is discussed.
Clicking on the 'back' icon will allow you to return to where you were before. A sequence of 'back' clicks allows you to retrace a few steps.
Some of the micro-experiences may be used in micro moments - as an opportunity presents itself.
Some exercises are mentioned. You may like to experience them with your nurturing friends.
Some folk read up on a few micro-experiences each day and then seek opportunities to use them.
This is a small sample of very simple acts that may make a difference:
'Threads' are strings or sequences of jumps in this page. Here are some threads others have found useful as starters. After exploring one reference, click the 'back' icon to come back to this spot and then click the next step in the thread.
'Self nurturing micro-experience starter' thread:
'Relating with other's micro-experience starter' thread:
'Getting started' thread:
Setting up a small gathering' thread
Ambiguity occurs when words may have more than one meaning. Ambiguity may be intentionally used in healing. It is possible for the listener to hear one meaning at a conscious level and to also take on board further meanings at unconscious levels. These further meanings may have healing potency. This pattern may be used where for some reason the person may reject or sabotage healing ways. Refer ethics, awareness of consequences, and sovereignty.
'Healing people can make a big difference.'
A sentence like this may be used, for example, in helping setting up a 'healing frame' to a context. The ambiguity in the above sentence sets up at least three possible meanings:
Using words that sound the same which have two or more different meanings (homonym). This pattern may be used to set up healing possibilities.
It's possible to always (all ways) do something!
The first meaning implies rigidity. The second meaning (more hidden) means 'to become more flexible' - almost the opposite to the first meaning. It's possible that this second meaning can 'ring bells' at deeper levels. Sometimes just one such sentence can 'strike a chord' and 'resonate' within the person - to loosen them up. See requisite variety.
'Changes can occur so that nuisances (new senses) can make a difference.'
If the word 'nuisances' is sensed, it is embedded within the notion of change implied by the words 'changes' and 'difference'. The second meaning 'new senses' creates a reframe of 'nuisances' and hints that we make maps or representations of our senses. 'New' further strengthens the idea of change. 'Can occur' sets up a presupposition.
sore saw soar
paw pour poor
The English language is full of words and expressions that provide scope for this pattern!
Keep an eye out for them. They're good to play with.
A typical response set up by a few repetitions of a simple stimulus. For example, the use of a young child's name accompanied by a 'tone of disapproval' can quickly set this experience for the child as a 'stop doing that' message, with resultant interrupt to behaviour. In traffic, the red traffic light means 'stop' and we use the brake; the green traffic light means 'go' and we accelerate. The lights are 'visual anchors'.
Accompany an experience, such as recalling pleasure, with perhaps a slight touch on the wrist and repeat this a few times. Soon the same wrist touch can enable ready access to pleasure. Anchoring is pervasively used in everyday life, though rarely noticed. It has wide applicability in healing. Any sub-element of any sense (e.g. tone) can be used to set up an anchor to activate experience in the same or a different sense. For example, using an auditory 'tone' to stop a child touching hot ashes.
We can practice setting up an anchor by exactly repeating a simple and unique stimulus a few times when we're in a particular state. Keeping the stimulus different from others to ensure multiple anchors are not set off. Test that the anchor is working by activating the anchor when you are not in the state to see if you do activate that state. If it doesn't work, continue the process when you are in that state and repeat test.
Sometimes it may be appropriate to have a person take on an assignment involving them in learning from first-hand experience. Another nurturer may enable the person in setting up and carrying out the assignment. Any of the micro-experiences and frames within this page can be built into the assignment. The assignment can be an isomorphic metaphor (*) for contexts and aspects in the person’s life. 'Isomorphic' means of similar form. The metaphor may match any one or more of the behaviours, ideas and emotions that may be part of a current dysfunctional context or more functional future potential. The assignment may create scope for corrective emotional experiences (*), allowing the person scope to use requisite variety (*) and ADT WR (*).
Example: 'prescribing the symptom' (*).
A person is overweight. This person has the habit of having her refrigerator filled with food 'in case friends dropped in' - tons of ice-cream and plenty of chocolate cake. The assignment is set up such that she is to give away, or throw out all the food currently in her fridge and elsewhere in her home. She has to find a food store two kilometres away and go on foot and only purchase food for herself for that day. She is only to eat food purchased by herself. She has to carry the food back in her arms. Any food not consumed within a day is to be discarded and fresh food purchased the next day. The assignment structures physical exercise every day. She can also feel the weight of the food first-hand. As well, the person is given the assignment to put on exactly two kilograms in weight.
She returns after two weeks having put on the two kilograms. She is then given the frame 'that for this fortnight, your weight has been under your control.'
For the next two weeks she is to continue her routine and has to put on one more kilogram. Again she fulfils the assignment and puts on the one kilogram.
During the first four weeks of the assignment she has walked an extra 112 kilometres. Fifty six of these involve carrying all her food. All the exercise is increasing metabolism and she is gaining physical tone. The next assignment is to lose three kilograms 'as she is now getting better at having her weight under her control'.
Again she fulfils the assignment. Each week thereafter the assignment is to loose a certain level which she does achieve.
In enabling a person to take on a personal assignment, part of the nurturer's task may be to:
We may think about how we could so challenge or engage the other person so they do do the assignment. As well, the nurturer may use any one or more of the micro-experiences in this page to complement the healing work done on the assignment with other healing ways. Both the nurturer and the other person may use requisite variety (*) that is, if something does not work, try something else.
Laceweb action research has been active in the Atherton Tablelands in Far North Queensland since the 1970s. One focal area on the Tablelands is Yungaburra.
The following is an example of one fortnight of Laceweb activity around the town of Yungaburra on the Atherton Tablelands in 1994:
Having all senses focused in the present and attending to what is happening in the here and now external reality. What is happening before us becomes the centre of sustained attention. Attending in uptime is invaluable in maintaining rapport and relating to others. In contrast, to attend to internal experience such as imagined experience or recall of past experience is called 'attending to downtime'. Refer concentrating (*), rapport (*), listening (*), reporting (*), becoming familiar (*) maps (*) and downtime (*).
Actions have consequences. It's possible to act without considering or taking account of consequences. This may lead to harm and strife. An awareness of possible and likely consequence may guide action. Some wonderful healing action can be ecologically intuitive with no prior idea of specific consequences and everything may proceed within an ethical (*) 'safety (*) frame (*). A sense of personal safety (*) and ecology (*) may suggest that we do have an 'awareness of consequences' in enabling support for this person at this time, context and place. An 'if this, then that' strategy (*) can be used to generate options (*) and possible outcomes.
Anchoring (*) may be used to set up:
Good mental health, like good physical health, is more than just the absence of illness. To live reasonably well in modern society requires an understanding of health in all its aspects.
For an individual:
Good mental health is a consistent sense of positive well-being.
For the neighbourhood and the nation
Mental fitness is the belief, perhaps unspoken, that most communities have a general resourcefulness that makes possible a vigorous, harmonious and creative way of life in which all citizens can find a pathway to reach their potential.
Such a hopeful philosophy requires that we be positive and deliberate in caring for our own health. It also requires that the laws, institutions and customs we give our assent to should be such that healthy way of life is possible and indeed encouraged.
Our chances of health are influenced by our genetic inheritance and by the circumstances and conditions in which we grow and mature. What are the factors involved? There are many understandings: Maori people speak of the four cornerstones of health:
If any dimension is threatened, the wairoa (total well-being) is threatened.
A similar approach has five aspects:
A person is in a bind if something is happening and there is little if anything they can do about it. Often people don't recognise the bind and this non-recognition contributes to them being stuck.
A double bind is where there is absolutely nothing they can do about it.
It is possible to set up therapeutic double binds so the person MUST change.
The following example was very powerful for the women concerned and produced profound change. It involved a person who stated that she was continually getting into terrible situations with men because she could not say 'NO!" In a healing group context a male nurturer said, 'Say 'No!' to me!'. The person either had to say 'No!' or refuse to say 'No!' which was also a 'No!' The nurturer had placed her in a therapeutic double bind - that is, in a bind and there is nothing she can do about it. Additionally, this bind has healing potential.
She went into a passionate confused dilemma and with emotion building started yelling, 'No!, No! No!' many times with great emotional force until she was completely spent and with tears and smiles hugged the nurturer for helping her. She later reported that she could say 'no'. Notice that being in the healing group context (*) and the healing frame (*) and subtle aspects of the nurturers being are aspects that may well have enhanced the therapeutic nature of the bind. Refer attending (*), listening (*), representations (*) and rapport (*).
Also refer Accessing Wellness
BONDI JUNCTION EXAMPLE
During the late eighties an enabling group of around 20 evolved a dispersed urban Laceweb therapeutic community in the Bondi Junction area. During its life of about eighteen months about 145 people became involved. Regular healing gatherings were arranged with other happenings, events and healing sharings taking place on an ad hoc basis.
During the regular 'sharing' days, anyone enabling a group session had around a minute and a half to have people 'doing', and learning by doing. 'Show ponies' who wanted to show off their grand theories got a gentle caring wind-up at 60 seconds, and told gently to give up at ninety seconds if they were still talking. 'Watch how others do it and have another go next time! Using this 'action frame' participants gained a very wide range of healing micro-experiences. Friendships were formed. No one had to be alone for Christmas dinner. The community was mutually supporting.
Around 50 attended the regular healing sharing days that were held in a private home. People brought food to share. We had regular mini banquets throughout the day. A few minutes before we 'returned to session' was 'preening time'. Everyone would do a minute of housework. 50 people doing a minute’s housework six times on the day and the place was always super tidy by the end of the day. All plates and cups were always washed and ready for the next banquet!
Dr Neville Yeomans’ House where Healing Sunday was Held
Specifying in detail:
Some people make very impoverished and or problematic maps of their experience. Calibrating another's maps provides scope to enable the other person to make more richer or ecological (*) maps or representations (*) of their world and the possibilities open to them.
Example: 'I am upset'.
Typically they are upset about something or somebody in the past, present or future. Details have been deleted.
'We are going tomorrow.'
'Where?', 'With whom? and 'When?' has been deleted. 'Going' is poorly specified - 'How are you going?''
It may be that the person is being 'closed' - just doesn't want to talk much right now. If this 'deleting' pattern is sustained, it may be more than being 'closed. It may indicate that the person is regularly leaving all the deleted material out of the representations (*) they make of their world. That is, they may be operating with very impoverished maps.
Helping a 'deleter' recover deleted material may assist such a person in having richer maps.
Refer sensory submodalities (*) and creating possible futures (*).
Nurturing may drain energy and be very wearing. A strong sense of personal safety (*) may allow us to pace ourselves and monitor our resourcefulness, energy levels and indicators of stress (eg. check breathing).
Ethical (*) concerns also call for withdrawing support when our own capacity to be of help is very low to the point of not been helpful to the other. There is virtue in developing and calling upon a support network who may monitor fellow carers.
Sometimes we attend to large chunks of a context. Sometimes to we attend to small chunks. Sometimes shifting the size of the chunk we are attending to can be valuable.
Example A - Stopping irritation
A young child is teething - it's crying and irritable and throwing food on the ground. These 100's of small moments throughout the day may have the potential to escalate irritation in adults. However, all these potentially irritating moments may become as nothing, as the parent from time to time makes momentary shifts in downtime (*). They may tap into the big picture - of experiencing the glow of pride now in seeing the child developing to adulthood and making his or her way in the world - a shift in the chunk-size being attended to, from 'small' to 'big'. The parent's reflections may take in possible wonderful futures and takes pleasure in these.
Example B - Interrupting overwhelm
Overwhelmed person: 'There's 1,000s arriving tomorrow for the gathering and I have to set up this whole water system by tonight!'
Nurturer: 'Is that a left-hand or right-hand thread?'
The person refocuses the overwhelmed person's 'chunk size' from 'total system' to 'small component'.
A person 'X' may see in person 'Y', problematic aspects of X's own life that is really not present in Y's life. This is called 'projecting'. For example, Peter says, 'John you shouldn't be telling people what to do all the time and judging and condemning'. Peter is doing precisely what he is telling John not to do! If Peter is doing these behaviours continually, and John virtually never does it, then typically Peter is projecting. Ensuring that we are not projecting while in the enabler role may assist the nurturer to focus on issues that are present in the other. It also helps in being clear about the enabling. Refer 'separating out own stuff' (*) and 'awareness of consequences' (*).
Concentrating on something(s) means that we are not concentrating or attending to something else. For example watching internal imagery tends to interrupt seeing externally. Attending to the arrival of a dear friend whom we have not seen for a while may mean we do not notice a head ache. We can use this capacity for healing - focusing on the desired states and outcomes, and disconnecting from the aversive. Refer associating (*), attending in uptime (*), down time (*), distracting (*) and dissociating (*).
In making sense of language, the mind tends to chunk what is joined by conjunctions. Examples of conjunctions are:
We anticipate links. For example:
Westerners hearing the sentence fragments
'knife, fork and .....' would anticipate 'spoon'.
'cup and .....' would anticipate 'saucer'
'lock and....' would anticipate 'key'
'Conjunctions' may be used to link ideas (sentences and sentence fragments).
The gathering is Sunday.
You may like to come along.
These two sentences can be linked by saying:
'The gathering is Sunday and you may like to come along.'
This new sentence links together something obviously true (the gathering on Sunday) with a suggestion (you may like to come along). Note that the last two words are an embedded command (*).
Linking 'suggestions' to 'things obviously true'
It has been found that if a suggestion is linked to a number of things that are obviously true, the suggestion also tends to be accepted.
Use conjunctions to link three obviously true statements to one or more suggestions. Repeat this pattern till you obtain outcome - for example, a shift to profound relaxation.
'While you're resting there and the chair is comfortable and you have your feet up, you're already beginning to slow down, and you have set this time aside for relaxing, and that's a good thing because it can refresh us, and so perhaps you can, make yourself even more comfortable now ...'
The pattern in the above example:
You are resting there.
The chair is comfortable.
You have your feet up.
You're already beginning to slow down.
You have set this time aside for relaxing.
Relaxing is a good thing.
Relaxing can refresh us.
Perhaps you can make yourself even more comfortable now
Linking two presuppositions to three things which are obviously true
Presuppositions and assumptions may also be more easily accepted when linked to things which are obviously true.
Because the harvesting is starting next week it's celebration time so people from the next village have been invited to a big feast and while that's happening we may explore healing ways that work and share micro-experiences.
Because the harvesting is starting next week (obviously true)
it's celebration time so (obviously true)
people from next village have been invited (obviously true)
to a big feast (obviously true)
while (sets up presupposition)
that's happening (obviously true)
we may (softener)
explore healing ways that work (presupposition)
share micro-experiences' (presupposition)
Healing storytellers tend to use conjunctions to join virtually all sentences so that the story flows along with differing things all linked together. This tends to become both engrossing and enchanting and draws us into the story reality and away from everyday life. Framing the context as 'story telling' sets up a 'context role' for the other as 'listener'. It also removes any of the normal indicators that it is the listener's turn to speak. Refer example from Distracting (*).
Example from The Prince and the Hag (Conjunctions are in italics.)
'Once upon a time there was a young prince who was so bossy everyone was heartily sick of him and he couldn't wait to be king so everyone would have to do what he wanted, and he became very sick himself and all of the healers tried to heal him and he was sick to death of all this and yet he just got sicker and sicker until he thought he would die, and finally one of the healers said, 'Only the old Hag at the edge of the world can save you', so he orders them to take him to the old hag, and as they reach where she lives the healers become afraid and run away and hide and the old hag appears unto him and he says, 'Hag, I am your Prince and you have to heal me, for I fear I will die', and the old hag says, I will obey you this time, but on one condition - you have to marry me first',
Refer Sovereignty (*).
Further example in using conjunctions with other healing patterns:
'Perhaps you can begin to settle down now, and it may well be that things can change without you having to do anything, as heart rate, and breathing, and all sorts of internal processes, can settle down without you needing to do a thing, and you can do any shifts that will make you even more comfortable now, and ....'
The healing patterns in this example are explored in 'Embedded suggestions, implications, presuppositions and commands (*). You may want to use this example to see if you can identify the healing patterns that it contains before shifting to the Embedded suggestion link.
Use generalisations (*) that have no content to allow the other person to add their specific meaning to what we are saying. Our words do not have 'content'. The hearer adds his or her own meaning to our words.
'Perhaps you have some things you may want to work on in new ways. And you may have some concerns and other things we can explore and some aspects you may want to follow up later.'
The words in italics are generalisations:
CORRECTIVE HEALING EXPERIENCE
Sometimes one experience can heal, such that we never forget the learning associated with the healing. Touching the stove burns!
Old man, a respected Australian Aboriginal elder set up contexts rich in possibilities for corrective emotional experiences to occur during the six weeks youths typically stay with him. Events that happen may be framed as healing experience by Old Man and he, or any of the boys, may pick up on the learnings - enhancing (*) and anchoring (*) them. Refer assignments (*).
Every artistic aspect of a culture (a way of life) may be used for nurturing healing.
Cultural healing action draws on influences from traditional and other cultures around the World, especially from the Philippines, though not simple applied.
Cultural healing action may run for less than an hour to several days (or weeks). People may be involved in energetic and not so energetic games and activities.
Enablers may have a broad concept of activities and possibilities for the time together. The process may start out with some structure or context, or a felt need of the participants. After a time, activities and games may begin to emerge (*) out of the spontaneous responding of the participants, with action evolving from the energy and inclination of the moment.
In a very real sense, the participants evolve their own experience together. Enablers may be there as resource people, though never as directors or gurus.
Cultural healing action tends to be 'wellbeing' based rather than 'issue' based, although issues may both emerge and be resolved. Contexts may be created allowing states of wellbeing to emerge. Typically, liminal (*) experiences create fertile contexts (*) with emergent properties (*). People begin exploring new ways of being in the world together and in the process, issues tend to cease to be. Action may place people into 'desired states' so that prior problematic behaviours are no longer a concern. To explore 'why' they used to do something when people have now changed becomes a some-what irrelevant exercise. Finding who was 'at fault' in prior behaviours is not particularly ecological or useful. Refer 'resolving independent of cause (*).
In keeping with the previous paragraph, action focuses on what is wanted, rather than on what is not wanted. Often enabler suggestions to explore what is wanted will have people talking about what the do not want. This may be reframed to being 'exploring what we do want.
Participants of all ages may explore creative and artistic ways of examining local cultural wellbeing matters that concern the participants and their communities. Generative wellbeing acts may result in many issues ceasing to be.
generative wellbeing acts such as:
Participants may create short plays, songs and rhythms, poems, stories, dances, murals and postcards, and other materials about these things. A strong sense of group and community bonding may develop or be strengthened. Often others - friends and relatives - may join in towards the finish of the gatherings to experience performances, games, and perhaps an exhibition of artistic products. Typically, participants have rarely, if ever, participated in artistic expression before.
To casual observers, people's cultural healing action may appear to be a curious mix of childlike activities, where grown-ups, adolescents and children may sing simple songs, work with crayons, pens, markers, pencils, chalk and coloured paper, and play games.
Some of the processes:
Social Mapping. Participants may explore the function of personal and community maps (*) and their significant features. They may construct social maps, or maps of their community's or their individual concerns; detailing points of origin, the destination, the landmarks and signposts, etc. - using cut-outs, drawings, and found objects. The creation of social maps may focus on producing graphic and directional representations of individual and community wellbeing aspirations, ideal situations, and possible courses to take. Refer creating futures (*).
Conflict Studies. Conflict may be a motive force for art - as in life. Recognising this, in some contexts, games and exercises exploring the various kinds of conflict may make up a significant portion of the early life of some cultural healing action. Physical conflict may be explored through such games as Tug-of-War, Dragons Tail, and various group Tag games. These may illustrate the tension that may evolve if force is used, particularly to oppose. The value of unified action, cooperative teamwork and therapeutic mediating ways in conflict resolving situations may be highlighted. Contexts may be rich with possibilities to incorporate/ embody any of the healing ways you know and those included in this page.
Jog-Freeze is a verbal conflict experience - participants jog in a circle and when two or three people are tagged, the jogging stops. Then the tagged people come into the centre of the circle and have an improvised healing mediation (*) and seek to understand each other's maps (*). These little segments are then discussed to explore factors that sustain and resolve conflicts.
Hidden disagreement may be explored by assigning subtexts (for example, undisclosed agendas, attitudes, motives and outlooks) to participants, then having them interact showing only a 'superficial character' embodying a totally different subtext to the world. As an example a person may have an open subtext of 'Act strong because life is a jungle and it is the survival of the fittest'. This may be linked with a hidden one of 'Do not trust anyone - people only use you up'. Participants eventually try to discover each others' subtexts as part of their differing maps (*) as a source of obvious, but implicit conflict among themselves. These processes provide rich opportunities to use many of the micro-experiences contained in this page (refer rapport (*), attending in uptime (*), listening (*), reporting (*), representations - maps (*), and metamodel (*).
Image Theatre and Forum Theatre.
The conflict exercises may naturally progress to image theatre, a basic device used in enriching wellbeing for issue dissolving. Participants often divide into groups of at least five, and each group devises three tableaux (frozen postures, attitudes, images and dialogue) depicting:
Forum theatre builds from image theatre. The situations presented in the group in stages can now be developed into a more fluid dramatic piece, complete with movement, sound, etc. The participants (still divided into groups) develop the piece either completely (ie., an aspect of wellbeing is enriched - a concern is resolved) or up to a crisis point only. Pieces are then performed with others as observers. Members of this audience stop the performance any time a person has concerns about what is being presented. During the replay, people stopping the performance do not to talk about why they want to change something. Rather they assume the role of the actor concerned or simply add another actor in the drama. The process can go on until the audience agrees that the performance offers a rich representation of the wellbeing enriching process.
If the performance is one that stops at a crisis point, the audience supplies a resolution to the crisis. As many actors again from the audience may rise to modify the piece. At the very end of these processes, a forum may be held with everybody present involved to further explore the presentations. Forum theatre thus becomes a process for dismantling the alienation between actors and audience typical of formal theatre. It also may serve as a rehearsal for action in the real conflict situations represented in the pieces . The healing cultural activities and dynamic 'group relating' may provide corrective (*), remedial and generative emotional experiences that may lead to personal and group concerns actually being healed/resolved during the process of exploring them. At the same time participants may be gaining competencies that they may use in the future.
Cultural healing action may enable healing potential within therapeutic space. It may create opportunities for exploring inner experience and outer reality - exploring the space between 'appears to be real' and 'experientially real', ie. what is felt somatically (in the body) - enriching the capacity of 'individual self' and the 'collective self' - as healer/actor in experiencing 'safe abandon' - surrendering to the unfolding moment and catching the flow - re-experiencing early childhood preplay processes of embodiment, projecting and role, dramatic play - exploring within the 'personal theatre' of the individual and community and creating the healing theatre of the group as a whole. The above processes may be used to enrich wellbeing while gaining the requisite micro-experiences in the process.
Healing Cultural Action involves actively fostering and sustaining cultural wellbeing. It fosters people extending their own culture as a balance to other cultures that may be dominant, elitist and oppressive. As well, it is a movement for intercultural reconciliation and wellbeing.
It may foster the development of Quick Response Healing Teams to resolve local community and international conflict. It may provide scope for people to actively engender and promote values, language, practices, modes of action, arts and other aspects of a way of life (culture). These in turn may enable social emancipation, intercultural healing, cultural justice, as well as social and environmental wellbeing.
Generally people do not want to be confused. However being both confused and very curious is an excellent state for learning. It leaves one open to new ways of perceiving. The taken-for-granted is on hold. A state of curious confusion is laden with liminal (*) possibilities. Refer the Interrupt pattern (*) for an example of the healing use of curious confusion.
Laceweb processes may sometimes have enablers and nurturers simultaneously charged up with excess arousal, and drained - like having the accelerator and brake on simultaneously. People may assist others and themselves in clearing unwanted states and renewing energies. Typically, a return to relaxed energised resourcefulness is valuable. Later if desired, in a resourceful state, the outcomes of the prior enabling/nurturing may be explored. Refer 'caring for carer' (*), shifting arousal states (*), liminal (*) and ultradian rhythm (*).
In Indo-European languages, nouns may imply a reality that is more greater or more substantial than that of a verb or adjective. A noun can imply that there is a 'thing' that 'exists' - that has a name. There's the idea that once a thing is named we somehow know something. 'Oh, he has 'attention deficit disorder'. Once verbs have been nominalised (turned into a noun form) we tend to sense that there is a 'substance' behind each kind of action. When this has happened - when the notion of a 'substance' has been created, it's all too easy to assume a substantial reality behind the word. We suggest, that for many nouns, this is problematical.
To put this another way, people pervasively turn active process into the passive and static by the shift from verb to noun - from 'doing' to 'thing' - for example, from 'failing' to 'failure'.
One wit said problematic 'nominalisations' are nouns you can't fit into a wheelbarrow.
For example the noun 'failure' - you can't put 'failure' into a wheelbarrow. Other examples are 'decisions', 'jealousy', and 'aggression'.
Let's say a person says:
'I am a failure!'
It sounds so final, so fixed. The verb 'to be' (I am. You are. S/he is) sets up an air of certainty. It is the case! 'You are a failure!' And it sounds so all pervasive; a failure at everything under the sun. 'What a reject!'
Consider what happens when we 'de-nominalise', that is, shift from the noun 'failure' back to the verb 'failing'. We now get the sense of a very different and circumscribed on-going process - that is in no way static. It may change.
The new sentence:
'I am failing.'
invites us to explore further.
We may guess that the deep structure (*) of this sentence is something like :
'Someone is somehow failing, sometimes, somewhere, in some context, in relating somehow with someone or more, in doing or not doing something, somehow, and feeling somehow as a consequence.'
To begin to specify generalisations we may ask:
How specifically are you failing?
The response we look for is 'generalisations specified'.
To recover deletions we may ask:
The responses we are looking for are 'deletions recovered'.
The distortion lies in the universal all pervasive mood implied by the word 'failure'
The response we are looking for is distortion removed.
The other questions can begin to put what's happening into a more dynamic frame that the person can do something about.
Answers to the above questions can lead to healing action. For example:
Other: 'I am a failure!'
Nurturer options: 'What have you been failing at?' (recover deletion)
'How specifically? ( specify generalised verb)
Nominalisations almost invariably involve generalising (*) the underlying verb and deleting (*) and distorting (*) contexts (*) content (*), process (*) and meanings (*) - refer language metamodel (*).
People may easily become overwhelmed by creating lists of unresolved issues in noun form. For example a group of bureaucrats created the following list of unresolved issues:
After making the list, you could see the energy drain out of them. 'The same old chestnuts!' This was followed by a group sigh of resignation, or to denominalise, they were all resigning from taking action. What would your reaction be if you were given this list of things to resolve?
Notice the 'feel' of the list when it is denominalised.
lousy decisions deciding
delegation problems delegating
control problems controlling
profit being profitable
liquidity having sufficient money
morale feeling good
The second list virtually tells you what to do. The words are expressed as process and action. The words themselves prompt clues in resolving the issues. 'How specifically? What? With whom?'
Which list would you prefer to resolve? Probably neither! Though it demonstrates healing possibilities
Often a group of people will refrain from discussing certain things, particularly if discussion will activate aversive consequences and 'up the ante' - increasing uneasiness, aggression, anger, depression and the like. Often this non-discussing is also never discussed, and this 'second - level' non-discussing in turn is not discussed. Having problematic aspects of life that are never discussed may create binds (*). If the non-discussing is not noticed by anyone involved, then everyone may be in a bind, and there is little any of those involved will ever do about it. If the non discussing is non-discussible, it may slide into a double bind - and from within the 'system', it may be that nothing can be done about it.
Often there will be well developed strategies to prevent discussion - for example 'easing in', where people hedge around the topic. As soon as they, or others become uneasy, the topic is changed or dropped.
Dissociating (*) and sensory submodality shifts (*) may be used to link people to non-discussible themes in 'safe' ways so that some entry into the 'non-discussible' may be possible.
Dissociated recall or imagining involves being able to watch and/or hear ourselves in some context by seeing and hearing our self (and perhaps others) from a 'third' person perceptual position (*). This is a profoundly different experience to reliving the experience as it happened previously, such that we see things unfolding as if looking through our eyes. This is the associated position. Recalling in associated vision typically activates the emotional states that accompanied the original experience. In contrast, viewing the experience in a dissociated way typically results in far less or no emotional re-experiencing.
Distracting can be used in healing, especially where a person is experiencing pain.
'Patch the clown asks the child if he wants to see his floppy fish. The child is exhausted from getting his burn bandages changed in the remote Russian hospital and when the child looks up and sees Patch for the first time with his ridiculous floppy plastic fish he is completely enchanted and tells Patch he is the most beautiful person he has ever met and then the little boy clowns with Patch as the nurses change the rest of his bandages and the boy is so lost in enchantment that he gives no evidence of pain as the nurses, with tears running down their cheeks at the profound beauty of the moment, finish their gruesome task.'
'Downtime' refers to internal sensing by recalling or imagining seeing, hearing or feeling something, or becoming engrossed in thinking. When people go into downtime, concentrating (*) more and more of their experience on internal sensory experience, they can change to profound dissociating (*) from the here-and-now external happenings. This state is what's called 'everyday trance states'. Typically, we all enter into everyday trance states many times every day. Just ask a person what they did last week and typically you can see their eyes defocus as they go into internal to recall. Typically they can revert back to everyday reality instantaneously. Sometimes it may take a few moments to reorientate.
While deeply into internal sensing or attending to their thoughts, they can be completely deaf and blind to the external world. However they still be able to attend at deeper levels (preconscious) to the nurturer. For example, they may still respond to, and take on healing suggestions. Refer sovereignty (*), ecology (*) and awareness of consequences (*).
Downtime can be contrasted with 'Uptime (*).
It is possible to 'bury' a suggestion, implication, presupposition or command within a sentence. This pattern may be used for creating healing possibilities that may be responded to at deeper levels and that may bypass critical aspects that may sabotage healing. Used with ecology (*) and respect for sovereignty (*). Refer ethics (*).
'Perhaps (softener) you can (embedded command).'
'Perhaps you can begin to settle down now, and it may well be that things can change without you having to do anything, as heart rate, and breathing, and all sorts of internal processes, can settle down without you needing to do a thing, and you can do any shifts that will make you even more comfortable now, and ....'
This can be specified as:
you can (sets up embedded command)
begin to settle (embedded command)
now (using time to set up a presupposition that they will begin to settle)
it may well be that (softly (may) sets up suggestion)
things (generalising - content free so allowing the person choice)
can (sets up suggestion)
change (presupposition - suggestion)
without you having to do anything (obviously true)
as heart rate (obviously true)
breathing (sets up suggestion to 'breath slower')
all sorts of internal processes (generalisation sets up suggestion)
can (sets up suggestion)
settle down (suggestion)
you can (sets up embedded command)
do any shifts (generalised command)
that will (strong set up - using 'will')
make you (using 'necessity' distortion (*)
even more (assumes current level of comfort)
comfortable (embedded suggestion/presupposition)
now (using time to set up presupposition)
The general form of the above sentence is:
'Perhaps you can B now and it may well be that C as D and E and F can G without you H and you can I that will make you J now and ....'
where the letters in bold are suggestions or commands or help set these up.
'Perhaps you can begin to settle down now and it may well be that things can change without you having to do anything as heart rate and breathing and all sorts of internal processes can settle down without you needing to do a thing and you can do any shifts that will make you even more comfortable now and ....'
A context may be set up which is rich with possibilities. Everyday life may be, for small moments or perhaps for a long time, 'enriched' - framed as healing wellbeing - as joyful, light - the healing power of playfulness and laughter - or spiritual - a glance - a smile - for perhaps a few hours - marked out - a boundary - and a beautiful setting with flowers and the setting sun.
These two complementary systems are fully discussed in the associated page Healing the Mindbody.
The following ethical frame-work is a model that may be used:
For enablers and nurturers:
Enablers and nurturers:
Recognition of Current Limits
For enablers and nurturers:
Public Discussion of the Together Approach
Refer Together (*). For enablers and nurturers:
Respect For Other Lifeways
For enablers and nurturers:
Some thoughts and sensory experiences become anchored (*) or otherwise linked to other thoughts, sensory experience or behaviours. Perhaps as an example, for an 'angry young man', any mention of the word 'police' can trigger rage. Refer synaesthesias (*), strategies and loops (*) and sensory submodalities (*).
A frame 'sets off' and enriches a painting. Other things may be framed. Suppose you have decided to have a few friends over to your place. It is possible to 'frame' the time together in particular ways - We may set up a frame as we invite people. Some examples:
A 'frame' may be an actual or symbolic border - an edge, setting something apart, creating a space (*), a place (*) and/or context (*). A frame may help in constituting meaning. A frame can put a 'boundary'(*) on a context. This is a context of a 'particular kind'. This is what is going on. This is the 'definition of the situation' (*). The frame can assist us in making sense of what we see, hear, feel, taste and smell.
A frame can clarify the meaning of behaviour. For example, a person sees another jumping around outside in a 'crazy' fashion - clutching his shirt. Having the additional piece of information that a poisonous spider has fallen down that person's shirt 'frames' what's going on, or more particularly, reframes (*) 'crazy' into 'self care'. Framing and reframing can be extensively used in healing. Refer interrupt (*)
Example - The fight
'We see a fight going on down a lane. A shot is fired. Three men grapple the gun off a fourth. A mugging? Two men hold the gunman. A third is punching him. Call the police! Wait - further down the lane we notice two camera men and a women with a sound boom. A few others are standing with clip boards. Ah yes, they are making a film. That's what's going on! Four men rush out of a door in the lane and start bashing the men who are restraining the 'gunman'. Are they part of the film or have they also mistaken this for a mugging? A person with a clip board is yelling at them to stop. Does he want to stop the shoot for some reason because the entrance of the four into the fight scene was not quite right or are they really mistaken strangers? Wait! Here comes the police. It is really a fight? No, these are pretend police and its part of the story line. The police jump out and we hear one say to the other. 'Okay, make this look good!' And they run up the lane. Yes, they are part of the film? A second police car arrives and the old women calls out from a second floor window. 'I cant see it, but the shooting and fighting is down the lane. The police run up and pull their guns and jump out into the lane and yell for all to freeze. These are real police and they are mistaken? Or is the mistake also part of the film. We notice others filming from the roof tops. Are they part of the film crew or is this a film about making a film? Will someone please tell me what's going on?'
Here we have an example of laminas (*) layer upon layer upon layer of embedded frames.
Deframing is to suddenly suspend or interrupt a frame - allowing the other person the freedom to have another frame emerge.
An Example of Deframing:
A person is about to hit another person. The person being attacked remains poised and says,
'Do you know what I like about you?
This remark has the potential to deframe the other person's reality from :
'Hey you! Prepare to be hurt.'
'I'm confused about what's going on.'
Refer the Interrupt Pattern (*) especially 'The Meat Cleaver story.
FRAME - FRAME MAKING
Frames (*) can be 'set up' or 'made' in many ways.
By using signs as markers and signifiers, eg. putting up sign at a festival:
'Laceweb workshops are to be held here each morning at 10AM.'
After meeting an acquaintance on a bush track, saying:
'I met a friend of mine who showed me a simple way she uses to lift herself when she gets very depressed and I tried it and it works wonders in a couple of minutes and you may want to use it and pass it on to your friends okay? Its as simple as this......'
A meta-frame is a frame on a higher logical level (*). It is the frame in which other frames take place. Like the 'first quarter' within the 'game'. Refer Laminas (*) and Frame (*).
The 'weekend camp-out' frame
'nurturer development' frame
'enabler development' frame
'Laceweb development' frame.
Reframing involves replacing one frame with another.
In context of pain:
"Notice that sensation.'
Reframe of 'pain' to 'sensation')
Other: 'I have a head ache.'
Nurturer: 'Excellent! This will give you an opportunity to try out some of the head ache cures.
I hope it doesn't go too quickly.'
Nurturer: 'What would you want to be happening?'
Other: 'I want to be able to remain calm - not lose my temper.'
Nurturer: 'Is that the most important thing you would like to explore now?'
Often people will persist in behaviour that both limits them and limits us as enablers. For example, (i) repeating a strategy (*) that loops and escalates them into traumatised despair. We may set up an understanding with the other about, and get prior agreement to interrupt and stop them at any time during our time together. Refer Frame - 'Setting up 'need not to know' (*).
A palm out, fingers up, hand signal can be set up as an interrupt anchor (*).
Often people will seek to persist in behaviour that both limits them and limits us as enablers. For example, repeatedly telling us what we already know or do not need to know, particularly if the telling traumatises the other. We may set up an agreement with the other that we may interrupt and stop certain behaviours (*). Refer 'Interrupt' Frame (*).
This allows a person to check new aspects - strategies, experiences, micro-experiences and behaviours. The person imagines in an associated (*) way that they are in a future context involving aspects where they may experience the new behaviours and see what outcomes their get. Its a way of 'homoeopathically' (minimally) trialing a new micro-experience. Refer 'as if' frame (*).
The nurturer may use the following to assist the person to imagine the future:
For people who have no future, that is, they never imagine the future, the nurturer can use time line (*) and submodality processes (*) and all of the above processes to help the person 'create futures' (*).
Once a person begins future pacing, the nurturer can calibrate (*) and watch for non verbal changes in the person as a validation of verbal reports the person can give after the imagining.
If the person has difficulty spontaneously using the new micro-experiences, this is a good indicator to do more work in setting up the new ways. Alternatively if the micro-experiences work in future pacing, this is a good indicator of future successful use in everyday life. Refer Pseudo Orientation in Time (*).
Fuzzy language involves using language that 'almost makes sense'.
This may be used to :
The first part of sentence doesn't fit the second half.
The two sentences:
'You've had a lot of things happening'
'You can learn from the things that happen.'
may be merged to make the following 'strange' or 'fuzzy' sentence.
'You've had a lot of happening(s) can be for a learning.'
Meaning and word order is jumbled and said with confidence, or said with implied confusion.
'Sometimes ehh....confusing....cant get it and....you know...comes clearer later....and that's okay....(head nod) yeh!....Like that.....'
Notice the ambiguity (*) in the last two words. 'Like that' may have an number of meanings:
This is another example of intentionally using generalising and deleting (*) for healing purposes
When people are stuck and/or persisting in problematic behaviours and strategies (*), nurturers may enabler a person to generate his/her own options and develop the micro-experience and inclination to do this in the future.
Nurturer: 'So you have found that the stranger you let live in your little
hut is growing drugs beside the house and you want everything
removed. What are you going to do about it?'
Other: 'I don't know'.
Nurturer: 'What are six different things you can do? What comes to
These notes are filled with practical micro-experiences in helping ourselves and others towards wholeness and well being.
You may have experienced that the behaviours some people use to 'help' may not be helpful! Here are some examples:
All of the forgoing is almost invariably not very helpful. Furthermore, it may be disempowering to both the 'helper' and the person supposedly being helped.
People often play at being weak and helpless so that they can get others to rush in and 'help them'. They may in fact not be at all weak and helpless. Rather, they may be very skilful and manipulative. Unhelpful help also lays the 'helper' open to being manipulated by the receiver of the 'help' - who may begin making continual and inappropriate requests for help, for example, for you to do things for them. Typically, they then start blaming the 'helper' for things going wrong.
Other: 'I tried what you said and it made it worse.'
(The implication is, 'It's your fault so fix it for me'.)
Other: 'So what should I do now?'
To deduce, imply or conclude that something is a fact, consequence, or result. Often inferences are partly or totally matters of opinion. Inferences are often partly or totally incorrect and/or untrue. People tend to assume that their inferences are unquestionably facts and True with a capital 'T'. Typically, people never question their inferences.
Often, people make inferences based on their prior inferences. And then they make further inferences on top of this till they are using third and fourth order inferences. It is highly likely that these are filled with opinions and things that are in no way correct or true. Again all of this is typically deemed to be absolutely true and a fact.
'They are all dangerous people'
'There is not one good one among them.'
'I know what they are thinking.'
'They are all trouble makers.'
'They always go out of their way to irritate us'
'They will never change!'
'They think we are stupid.'
'They are worse than cur dogs and far more dangerous.'
'The only good one is a dead one.'
Notice that these inferences are filled with generalisations, deletions and distortions (*). The metamodel (*) may allow exploring the truth claims. Refer discussing the undiscussible (*), relational mediating (*) and beliefs as guides to action (*).
When the safety of self, others or the focus person is at risk (death/serious harm)
To stop pathological/non ecological behaviours
Where over-adaptation creates rigidity
To interrupt loopiness
To get ecological outcomes quickly, with respect for others' sovereignty (*)
Story example - The Meat cleaver
When the jail heavy arrives late for dinner you can't have only small bits of roast pumpkin left to give him. He has to have the same size as others or there's hell to pay. He'll ring your neck later. The answer - all bits have to be the same size. Fred's new to the jail kitchen - doesn't know this size bit. Fred the pot scrubber. Serving six for grievous bodily harm. Dangerous bastard.
Word comes that the dried food order's arrived. All except Fred go to trolley the stuff in. When they left, the vegie cook was about to do the first cut of the large blue grey pumpkin. The meat cleaver does the best job. From then on it is the big knife. Even cuts make even bits. No small bits for the heavies. Gotta remember that!
So all the prisoner-cooks leave Fred - all alone in the kitchen. Pots to scrub for roast. And before him, the pumpkin, the meat cleaver and the chopping block. Kung Fu time! Smash pumpkin time. And it's the only pumpkin. Bad mistake happening.
The meat cleaver raised for the death by a thousand chops. Brian walks in. Brian's a social worker. Has message for the vegie cook. Spots Fred about to chop the pumpkin. Realises big trouble rising!
'Hey Fred, you better not do that because....' Bad mistake! Remember! Fred's in for grievous bodily harm. Bad temper. Strong bastard. Hates being told. And he's got the meat cleaver in his clenched fist!!
Fred completely looses it. Off the planet. Grabs Brian by the shirt front. Spits words of venom into Brian's face.
'YouX#Y&X#$!!! Who the xz$#%@ do you think you are, trying to tell me what to X#$@ do. I'll X@#$...smash your #$@V face! You X#@Q#!!!!
Loosely translated - 'Prepare to die!' Unfortunately he's got the meat cleaver!!
Brian's held by shirt front, so his face is inches from Fred's face. Brian - calm, relaxed and smiling - suddenly leans his head around to Fred's left ear, whispering,
'Fred! Do you know what I like about you......?'
Brian returns to the front. Fred's stopped talking. Eyes glazed and rotating. Meat cleaver held high, frozen in space. Fred's confused. Real confused! His hand lets go of Brian's shirt. Drops slowly. Brian waves his hand slowly in front of Fred's eyes and then points to the meat cleaver.
'Hey Fred! Even though you were mad as a meat axe, (pointing at meat axe) you have stopped...... you have tremendous self control. That's what I like about you!'
Fred slowly shakes his head - looks at ground - looks around kitchen - puts meat axe on chopping board - takes a deep breath - lets out gruff sigh - walks back to pots as he looks back at Brian and says,
Man ! You're a kook! (translation 'crazy person')
Half an hour later Fred invites Brian to play tennis with him. Fred thrashes Brian in straight sets!'
Read through the notes in the above Pattern Interrupt Section again. Identify the following elements in the meat cleaver story:
The following stories will be written in due course.
From 'limin' (Latin) meaning the threshold, the last step before the entrance. 'Liminal' experience is 'at the threshold' - being open to change - a turning point. Staying and 'working at the threshold' is to stay in liminality. The steps that lead up to the limin are preliminary. For example, see Frame (*).
Being 'liminal' may have the feeling of 'safe abandoning' of the old - to safely surrender to the moment in profound engrossment. 'Moment' may have a twofold sense - as in 'small amount of time' and as in 'force producing a moving or turn'. It may embody the shift:
Normally these two aspects of the nervous system work in opposite directions. If the energising system (sympathetic) activates, the slow-down system (parasympathetic) shuts down and vice versa. Refer Shifting States of Arousal (*), debriefing (*) and ultradian Rhythms (*). Liminal states may change this process so that both escalate - what some cultures call 'tuning' - and we can go into profound states of relaxed energy - typically accompanied by hyper-awareness. This profound liminal state is rich for new possible ways of being.
Enablers may set up liminal contexts and liminal spaces. People in liminal states may be for the time 'threshold people'. In the liminal state their attributes may be rather ambiguous. This is because the condition of 'liminality' and being a 'liminal person' tends to elude or slip through normal classifyings that locate places and positions in social space. 'Liminal people' tend to be neither here nor there; rather they may be betwixt and between the normal. Liminal states may be enriched with possibilities (*).
The ambiguous and indeterminate attributes of liminality may be expressed in rich metaphors and symbols such as:
and as one person characterised it, the merging together the following three metaphors:
While such a common part of human experience, people are often poor at listening. One's internal thoughts can interrupt hearing another person. Good listeners remain silent internally. That is, they are not talking to themselves inside their head while attempting to listen to the other person. You're in effect temporarily deaf. To put it another way, internal hearing interrupts external hearing.
Effective listeners can recall what the other person said and how they said it. Poor listeners have little recall of what was actually said or have recall of only what the 'listener' interpreted the speaker as saying or what they think the speaker should have said.
Very good listeners attend to both the process (how the person is saying something - eg., in an agitated way with eyes darting everywhere) as well as the content (what the person is saying. Typically people are very poor at process attending and become locked in and engrossed with content.
Refer exercise in reporting (*).
An information classing process whereby the higher the logical level the more inclusive and general the class, and the lower the logical level the more the specific the classing.
A question to lower the logical level is, 'What specifically?'
A question to raise the logical level is, 'To what class does that belong?'
Often paradoxes disappear when we consider that we are talking about two or more things that belong to different logical levels.
For example a 'symptom' is typically aversive and indicates some disease, sickness, trauma, malady and the like.
It seems perverse and paradoxical to 'prescribe the symptom' (*). Looked at within the 'diseases and their symptoms' level it doesn't make sense. From the higher logical level of 'healing diseases and their symptoms', prescribing the symptom does make sense because it can work.
Have you ever shared an experience with a few others and then, when you have recalled it some time later, everyone seems to have a very different version of what happened. It's as if you were all at different happenings. This is rather a common experience.
It tends to happen because for one thing, different people attend to different aspects of what is happening. Some people who are very visual tend to see more of what's happening. Auditory people tend hear more of what's happening. People who have a preference for touching and feeling may get more of a feel for what is happening.
Some people are there but are in downtime (*) and not attending much at all to what is happening around them. They may have little recall at all!
Apart from these differences, people may further filter what they attend to. For example, some people tend to filter for what is, for them, 'right' about what is happening. Others may filter for what is, for them, 'wrong'. Others do not use this 'right'/ 'wrong' frame (*) at all.
Some attend to the 'broad sweep' of what is happening. They generalise.
Others attend to specific bits of what is happening and ignore the rest. They delete.
Others may skew or distort what they see, hear and/or feel. For example, they may use universals like:
The may use necessities
The may use impossibilities
'It was the same thing again. Every time we get together everyone gets upset and we can't do anything about it. Nothing! Everything about the mess is impossible to fix. We have to keep people apart. We must get this through to people.'
Because of the richness of life experience we all:
Refer metamodel (*).
Typically, we use these three processes when we make inferences (*) about others. We also use them when we make inferences based on our prior inferences.
The three processes, and filters like the ones mentioned above, account in some measure for differences between different people's view of the same event.
Apart from these filters, something else is happening. We do not 'receive' inputs like a camera or tape recorder. It is not 'straight recording'. Even as we are seeing and hearing, we are 'constructing' the sense we make of our senses, thoughts and feelings. We make our own 'representations'. We make, as it were, maps of the territory. And importantly, the map is not the territory! We would never make this confusion between a map and the chunk of land that it re-presents. And yet many people mistakenly view their map as THE TERRITORY - the Truth.
While filters assist us in coping with the massive and complex input from both outside and inside our body-mind, these same filters may result in non-ecological outcomes.
People vary in the extent their maps 'match' the territory. Some have very impoverished maps. This may distort every aspect of the person's being in their world including their experiencing of the passing moment, their relating with others, their recall of the past, and their imagining of the future. For example, trauma may result in impoverished and distorted maps. The latest research in memory suggests that every recall is a re-construction .
For example, some people may recall past traumatic events as if they are happening right before their very eyes again (refer associated (*) and sensory submodalities (*). Everything may be larger than life. Things may be closer - right in their face, as it were. To the extent they see things, these may be in shades of grey. There is no colour in their past. Re-seeing things in this way may be linked to the immediate firing off again of all of the awful feelings and the movement into problematic physiology (*). Every recall may re-traumatise. Even past good times may be hazy and in shades of grey through to black - with no colour and no sparkle.
Other people may recall a past trauma as if it is a very tiny visual image that is somehow placed way behind them to their left. It is a dissociated (*) image. That is, they can see themselves in the former time and place. It may be in colour. The recall may not be accompanied by any emotional reaction. This is a profoundly different way to recall than the way mentioned in the previous paragraph. Refer swish pattern (*). We reconstruct the past and there's all sorts of ways to do this!
Understanding all of the above has important implications. Sharing maps may greatly enhance understanding. It is invaluable in mediating.
Cultural differences adds another level of differences between maps. These differences may be identified, specified, accepted and celebrated.
The metamodel (*) is excellent for specifying the filters people use to construct their maps (refer calibrating (*)). Attending in uptime (*), using rapport (*) and listening (*) micro-experiences also help. All the above can assist in calibrating the way we and others constructs our separate maps. These micro-experiences and all of the other healing ways mentioned in this internet page may be used to assist ourselves and others to enrich our maps.
Because of the richness of life experience, we all:
We use these filtering processes for everything we do. We use them in all aspects of language. We use them in making sense of what comes in via our senses. We can't attend to everything. These three processes are very useful in allowing us to cope with complexity.
Enablers and nurturers may help a person:
Examples of Generalisations:
Lack of referential index Who/what referring to, poorly specified
Examples of Deletions:
Comparison deletion Where a comparison is being made, but deleted
Dimension deletion Where a dimension has been deleted
Author deleted Where some idea or claim is made without identifying the author
Examples of Distortions:
Necessity distortion Saying something is necessary, when it isn't
Impossibility distortion Saying something is impossible, when it isn't
Universal distortion Saying something is universally the case, when it isn't
Sentences may be full of the above patterns.
'Action is down in our area and we need more enabling for our support group.'
It may be that, in the particular context the above sentence is stated, we may not respond at all. The other person may continue speaking. It may be that in responding to the above sentence we do not ask a question.
We may use the metamodel with the above example to generate many potential questions and observations about the way the person represents (*) the world to themself. To respond with a barrage of questions may overwhelm and not be ecological.
However, in a particular context one or a few of the following questions may 'work' in specifying the above sentence.
Verb unspecified How specifically is action 'down'
Generalisation What action?
Dimension Deletion Down by how much?
Comparison deletion Compared to what?'
Deletion Action by whom?
Deletion In what contexts?
Deletion What kinds of action
Deletion About what?
Generalisation Whose area?
Generalisation Which area?
Verb unspecified Down how specifically?
Verb unspecified Enabled how specifically
Lack of referential index Whose support group?
Author deleted They need enabling - according to whom?
Generalisation You say, 'We need.' Who need the enabling to take place?
Deletion Who in the support group need enabling?
Deletion What additional enabling is need?
Deletion Who already have been involved?
Deletion What enabling has happened already?
Necessity Distortion What would happen if their was no enabling?
Necessity What things other than enabling could happen?
If visual: What's your view? How do you see this?
If auditory: What do think? How's it sound to you?
If kinaesthetic: What do you feel?
The sheer quantity of questions from just one sentence hints at the pervasiveness of generalising, deleting and distorting. If a person talks for a few minutes we may use the metamodel to help generate almost endless questions and a strong sense of their maps (*). Refer Rapport (*), Pacing (*) Leading (*) preferred sense mode (*) inferences (*) and sensory submodalities (*).
Micro-experience in using the metamodel allows this mass of potential 'entry points' to be at our finger tips'. It implies highly refined rapport (*), listening (*) and attending micro-experiences (*) and the ability to stay in uptime. By attending in uptime and listening while using the metamodel it is possible to select out of perhaps many hundreds of potential responses, one that is absolutely perfect for the moment - one that for example melts the tension, or that allows the flash of insight for yourself and/or the person or that goes to the heart of what is going on for the other person.
Lack of referential index
Standard questions: Who specifically? What specifically?
Other: They all came.
Enabler: Who specifically came?
Outcome: Reference specified
Standard question: How specifically?
Other: We went to the gathering
Enabler: How did you go?
Outcome: Verb specified
Standard questions: Who? What? When? Where, specifically?
Other: Some of the elders are coming tomorrow
Enabler: Who among the elders are coming? When?
Outcome: Generalisation specified
Standard questions: Who? What? When? Where?
Other: Some were delighted.
Enabler: About what?
Outcome: Deletion recovered
Standard question: Compared to whom?
Other: They have had more support.
Enabler: Compared to whom?
Outcome: Comparison recovered
Standard question: By how much?
Other: They have had more.
Enabler: How much more?
Outcome: Dimension recovered
Standard question: According to whom?
Other: Some were upset.
Enabler: Who said so?
Outcome: Author recovered
Standard question: What happens if it doesn't happen?
Other: We have to meet.
Enabler: What if we don't?
Outcome: Necessity challenged
Standard question: What happens if it does happen
Other: We can't meet there.
Enabler: What if we did?
Outcome: Impossibility challenged
Standard response: emphasise the universal, e.g. Everybody?
Other: Everyone is upset.
Standard response: Offer counter example
Other: All dogs bite.
Enabler: I've know many that don't!
Outcome: Universal challenged
Using the Metamodel for Healing
The metamodel may be used in two broad ways.
Firstly, to specify generalisations, recover deletions and challenge distortions. This may increase both own and the other person's understanding of their thinking and maps (*). We may obtain more specific and accurate information. It may assist a nurturer to help the person more quickly if the occasion warrants it - for example we want to help someone and our time is limited - the boats about to leave!
Secondly, enablers and nurturers may intentional use generalisations, deletions and distortions in healing ways.
Example (a pause is signified by '.....'):
'....and in relaxing more now....there are parts of you that may recall good times...... and taking your time.... for that to ....begin to happen perhaps....now..... so you may perhaps enjoy what .....comes to mind..... as you perhaps ....may relax more now .......in various ways.... and in seeing things again in the mind’s eye....(nurturer notices smile of recognition of recall of a past context on the other's face and acknowledges it )...Good!.....and now you may like to .....look at that again ......and see if you can tell .......how you feel about it...... and (notices person is shifting out of depression into relaxed comfort)...... the changes that are occurring in you right now.... (notices the person enjoying the comfort and acknowledges that) Yes!.... That's right!....and taking all the time you need for all of that.....because that can be a good thing to do right now....for learnings.....
Exercise: Use the metamodel above to identify each generalisation, deletion and distortion in the above example.
Refer a similar exercise in the section on Pseudo orientation in time (*).
Refer also examples of the therapeutic use of generalisations, deletions and distortions in 'Content free generalising' (*) and 'Embedded suggestions, implications, presuppositions and commands' (*)
A paradoxical healing action is a healing process that does not seem to make sense. When looked at from a different logical level (*) the paradox may disappear. An example would be 'prescribing a symptom'. Refer 'logical levels (*) and telling a person to do the opposite of what you would prefer them to do. Refer polarity response (*).
Also refer Therapeutic Binds and Double Binds.
A perceptual position is any point of view taken by a person at a specific time.
At One - Mystical
A sense of merging with everything in the physical universe - and then merging with the metaphysical - going beyond time to merge with God. Perhaps the ultimate mystical experience.
Distant Microdot - Integrity Under Extreme Stress
To survive in times of extreme psycho-emotional and physical stress - creating a place for integrating, balancing and renewal of resources.
Use downtime (*) and sensory submodalities (*) to leave one's body and have one's distilled essence reduce to a microdot in space and 'fire' everything in the known universe millions of light years away. All of the light from all of the galaxies and star systems are as one distant bright beautiful speck of light that is way in the distance. This is a profoundly still, silent state. It is wrapped in a safe, soft, comfortable, inky and velvety blackness - without sensation, except a profound knowing and experiencing of integrity and strength and a surety of being able to return to ordinary reality at will.
First Person - Self
The performer in their own body.
Second Person - Other
The performer outside of their body as an 'other'.
A meta position: that of the performer observing themselves and the other from outside
A healthy 'sense of safety' will activate signals that alert us whenever we are in danger. Many people do not have a well-developed sense of safety and it may only alert them in a narrow set of circumstances. A healthy 'safety' alert may be set up through anchoring (*). If we having a healthy sense of safety and know it will signal when we are in possible danger, then we don't need to be preoccupied with safety.
Physically, being generally 'open', 'loose' and 'up' as compared to 'closed', 'tight' and 'down'. A typical set of moves by people who feel vulnerable is to move into a cringe position. They may do this by doing the following set of moves:
Shifting to this 'cringe' posture when we feel vulnerable can increase our sense of vulnerability! It is a kinaesthetic bind (*).
It can shut down breathing and restrict the capacity to both move and enter into resourceful states, for example like 'a feeling of poise and calm alertness'. In contrast we may have our chest 'open' and 'up', with our arms down by our sides. Now on first hearing, this may perhaps appear to increase vulnerability. Experience suggests that we may learn to use this posture to easily enter powerful states of being. We suggest you experience shifting between these two sets of posture - cringe and open tallness - to notice the difference! Refer safety (*), personal safety (*) and interrupt (*).
This segment explores a nest of similar behaviours - assuming, implying, presuming, presupposing, to require something before hand as a necessary condition.
The nurturer, within the metaframes of requisite variety (*), ADT WR (*), ethics (*) and sovereignty (*), can for example presuppose an outcome. Some behaviour or experience may be presupposed in such a way that the presupposition is typically not noticed.
'Perhaps during our time together this time we may explore a few things and it may well be that by the end of the morning a number of things may be resolved and before we start now you may like to make yourself more comfortable.'
This sentence contains many presuppositions.
during our time together: presupposes healing will continue
this time: presupposes healer has been previously and sets up hints for the other person to recall and access and re-enter the healing states experienced during the last meeting
we may explore a few things: presupposes the other person will allow this
by the end of the morning presupposes the meeting will last all morning
a number of things may be resolved: presupposes the other person will allow healing possibilities and that a number of aspects may be involved and resolved
and before we start now: presupposes the other will allow a start to healing and that it will happen very soon
make yourself more comfortable : presupposes an existing level of comfort and that the person can and will take action to become more comfortable
Any reference to time or duration can set up a presupposition.
Before we start......(that we will start)
To conclude......(that we are about to finish)
Before you go....(that you are going soon)
.......more calmness.......(there is some existing level of calmness)
the next time we........(that there will be a next time)
Refer Conjunctions (*).
Anywhere, indoors or out, may become recognised as a 'place' for a few moments or long term. Places may have meaning and memories attached. They may move inside of us. We may re-member them. Places may become enriched. People may sense possibilities. Places may be framed (*). Often the 'particular' more than the 'general' may happen there. 'This is where we 'X'.' Places tend to have associated contexts (*). 'This is the place Tim began walking again.' 'This is where we had our first enablers gathering.' We chance to meet on the trail, taking the moment to offer a sharing of healing ways, and briefly change the context, so in the interchange transforming wellbeing. This bit of trail becomes a special place in time and space - becomes our special place - where we are sharing enrichment. It becomes a long re-membered place. The experience contained within it is inside of us.
Becoming familiar with a place. We may walk in uptime (*) attending to a place and its surroundings such that we 'take in' the landscape and all of its features - we internalise it - we have the landscape inside of us - it becomes a part of us. Anything that happens at this place enriches our familiarity. The place becomes a natural anchor (*) for re-entering into memories and resource states that we have experienced at this place. Similarly, by imaging we are back at this place the same thing can happen - we find that we can re-enter into states of being and resources (*) like we did the first time and do it easily. Refer pseudo orientation in time (*) and Together Approach (*).
Some people have a habitual reaction, in certain contexts, to do the opposite of what another person suggests or demands. This is called a 'polarity' response. With respect, we may give a suggestion to a polarity responder, such that what we are suggesting is 'hidden' within it's negation.
'Because you are so tense there is probable no way that you can become very relaxed now.'
One can imagine a polarity responder's reacting to the suggestion:
'There's no way that you can become very relaxed now.'
And saying 'Oh yeh, that's what you think!' and then becoming profoundly relaxed!
The expression 'become very relaxed now' contains the suggestion and can be slightly 'marked out' perhaps by under-emphasising it. The polarity responder tunes into the 'no way' and does the opposite - that is, becomes very relaxed. Perhaps at a deeper more cooperative level the person hears the embedded suggestion (in italics) and so the unconscious compliance supports the polarity response. The person becomes very relaxed!
Pseudo orientation in time involves shifting either into past tense or future tense for healing purposes.
Now....about these new micro-experiences you have just learned...to explore now.....how you can become very experienced in these .... and you can perhaps use your imagination now....and go about two years in the future and create a context where you are using these micro-experiences now....taking all the time you need to do that.... and when you have that....look around you to see everything that's happening.....(seeing the other looking around and acknowledging that) Good! And noticing what you are hearing yourself say....and how you are saying that.....and how you feel......(allow time for them to experience this) good!...and when you are ready you can leave that....and you may go around a further year into the future now....taking the time to do that.....well after you began to be very good at using this new micro-experience you have just learnt ......and in the future now..... three years in the future from now....you can recall back a year ago ......to a time .....you can imagine now ......when you had gained highly refined ability in using these micro-experiences you have just learned.
Use the metamodel (*) to identify the intentional use of generalisations, deletions and distortions in the above example.
Refer future pacing (*).
Notice the shift from past tense to present tense in the following excerpt. Present tense is a pseudo orientation in time back to the time the story is supposed to have taken place. Present tense may also give more of a sense of reality to the story. It is happening right now. Words indicating tense are in bold. Words in present tense are in italics.
'Once upon a time there was a young prince who was so bossy everyone was heartily sick of him and he couldn't wait to be king so everyone would have to do what he wanted, and he became very sick himself and all of the healers tried to heal him and he was sick to death of all this and yet he just got sicker and sicker until he thought he would die, and finally one of the healers said, 'Only the old Hag at the edge of the world (shift to present tense) can save you', so he orders them to take him to the old hag, and as they reach where she lives the healers become afraid and run away and hide and the old hag appears unto him and he says, 'Hag, I am your Prince and you have to heal me, for I fear I will die', and the old hag says, I will obey you this time, but on one condition - you have to marry me first',
People in rapport are in accord and harmony. Observe people in close rapport and you'll notice they are in lock-step - they're synchronised. One person does something and the other person does it. For example, at some point aspects of posture take on similarities. People in rapport start to breath in the same way and at the same time. One person picks up their drink and the other person does the same. As one leans forward, so does the other. They talk at the same speed, tone and volume. They become the complete focus of each other's attention. They concentrate (*) on each other and dissociate (*) from the balance of reality. They tend to stay in uptime (*) highly focused (on the other) and attend and listen (*) only to the other.
We may fast-track this process by pacing (*) the other person. We don't exaggerate, mimic, or ape as that may cause offence. Pacing is typically never noticed by the other person.
while talking, listening and attending to each other (and to the enabler) the enabler introduces, one at a time, the following aspects to match:
Visual: 'Look, I want to show you something to see if you....
Auditory: 'Listen I want to talk about something I heard.....
Kinaesthetic: 'I want to touch base to check how you feel about..
Sometimes, it may be appropriate to break rapport to:
Refer interrupt (*).
Pace some behaviour and then suddenly do that behaviour very differently.
Eg: Shift from pacing:
By 'attending in uptime' (*) being able to repeat both process and content (*) (verbal and non verbal) of the other person. The following two exercises explore aspects of listening by structuring non listening. Refer Prescribing the symptom (*).
Non listening - A
Sit opposite your partner. Both think up something that you would really like to share with your partner. Both start talking to each other at the same time. If you start laughing or listening, pause, re-centre and start telling your story.
After a few minutes, stop and discuss the experience.
Non listening - B
Select a wonderful experience that you want to share with your partner. One partner keeps their eyes open and starts vividly recalling the experience. The other partner may use the following suggestions to aid them to recall. Allow plenty of time in the pause signified by ....
'And perhaps being back there in your experience in your minds eye....and noticing things....and looking around in that prior time....and beginning to hear what is happening back there ....and checking how you feel.'
While the person begins to recall, the other partner then quietly observes the appearance of their partners face. Typically, the person who is recalling will begin to get a vacant stare. Their eyes may become glazed. The muscles may relax. The colour may drain out. Refer downtime (*) and every day trance state (*).
Once the person has had time to settle into the internal recall, the other partner can begin to tell their story aloud. If the person who is engaging in internal recall starts to attend to the other, they then re-centre themselves, take a breath and begin recalling their own experience internally again.
After about two minutes stop and discuss the experience.
Swap roles and repeat the exercise.
Attending and reporting
(i) Working in pairs. One partner is the speaker, the other the listener/attender/reporter
(ii) the listener:
(iv) the listener then repeats back (reports) everything the other person has just said both verbally and non
Work in pairs with all pairs very close together. This adds a lot of 'surround sound' and demonstrates how well we can attend to our 'other' and dissociate from all the other pairs.
Discuss the experience and then swap roles and repeat the exercise.
On subsequent repeats of the exercise:
The above exercises may highlight the effect and possible consequences of being in uptime or downtime while attempting to listen to others.
Effective relaters notice when another person is going into downtime to do some internal processing and pause to allow the person scope to do that. When the person re-orientates to uptime, the conversation can be continued. Once people have process awareness of downtime they may begin to notice just how often people are in downtime. If you do not notice this, you may spend a lot of time talking to people who are effectively deaf and can not hear a word you are saying!
If something doesn't work, try something else. This links the enablers into a 'can do' frame (*), seeking options, flexibility, choice and ADT WR (*).
Laceweb processes tend to focus directly on 'wholeness' and 'wellbeing' - what the person wants their life to be - how they would be living, what they would be experiencing, what specific things would be happening, how they would be feeling.
The process and micro-experiences outlined in this page may support people moving between where they are and where they want to be. Laceweb experience has been that all manner of things may be resolved without any need to mull around in causes.
Let's say a car breaks down. Finding the cause structures the 'fix'. An engine runs rough and is loosing power - sounds like a spark plug needs cleaning. This nexus or link between 'cause' - and 'resolution' works for machines. It often has little value in psycho-social healing.
Firstly it's likely that the causal process is complex - there's multiple contributing causes, with many intervening factors.
Secondly, often we have no way of unravelling this. Many involved in the 'causal process' may be dead or uncontactable.
Thirdly, reliving the cause can retraumatize and be extremely wearing for all concerned.
Fourthly, the cause may have no relation to, or give any indicators on how to resolve it. Knowing that a person has been traumatised by X, where X is known in detail, doesn't necessarily indicate what action will 'resolve' the trauma.
Importantly, experience has shown that people can move to wellbeing without them, or any support person, paying much attention to causal processes at all. If you don't need to explore cause, and doing it is unpleasant and/or non ecological - you may want to forget 'cause'.
Any behaviour may have 'use' in some context. Typically, the behaviour has been acquired as 'the best option' the person could come up with in the life circumstance they found themselves. Using even 'problematic' and 'impoverished' behaviour can be the way the person copes. To take these behaviours away may be devastating. It's all they have. All behaviours, all physical and psychological states of being and all emotional states are resources that a person can draw upon in an appropriate context.
'A young girl has an ability to use words in a devastating fashion. She has been using this ability on her peers and reducing them to quivering messes. The girl is enabled to add other behaviours to her repertoire and she stops using her 'devastating tongue'. However she still has this powerful ability and one day it may come in handy in stopping older malevolent energy in it's tracks.'
For example, most people do not like to feel hopeless and helpless. These feeling are very valuable resource states. They can save our lives.
'Fred was new to the Australian outback. First trip in his four wheel drive. Doesn't know he has cracked his diff and lost his oil. Good for about ten more kilometres. Fred is 160 kilometres from the nearest habitation. He's torn his water bottle as well. No more water. Doesn't know that either. Right now Fred has jumped into a deep hole in the sand. It's cool down where he is. The cliff creates some shade. That's why he jumped in. Big mistake! When he tries to get out he will only bring down more sand into the pit. The roots he was going to use to get out won't support his weight. Dry rot. He can't get out and he doesn't know it. Fifteen more minutes and the shade will be gone. Forty more minutes and it will be 60 degrees down there! He will fry! And yet, as we speak a guy is walking past within calling distance with a string of camels laden with food and water and a length of rope - everything Fred needs to survive. Fred is in a hopeless and helpless state but he doesn't sense it - so he is a dead man.'
This section explores some ways to use our senses for healing. As an example, some people are burdened because they have thoughts racing in their minds at inappropriate times - say 2 AM in the morning.
Using tongue for internal silence
The following process may be very useful for people who have uncontrollable thoughts racing (particularly late at night when you want to go to sleep). Each of the senses have submodes. Refer submodes (*).
Sensory Code: Ai The primary sense involved is Auditory and the focus is internal dialogue
Auditory Submodes of the thoughts - possible examples:
refer calibrating (*)
Each of our senses have many submodes. For example, if we imagine seeing something, it may have size, colour, form, and location. These submodes help constitute our experience and the representations and maps (*) we make of our experience. We all do this all the time. Typically, we can all easily make changes at the sensory submodality. These changes may have a profound effect on wellbeing.
To take a simple example -
You may have noticed changes in your response as you made these changes at the submodality level. Refer maps and representations.
Submodality change can assist in removing trauma, phobias, compulsions, obsessions and a wide range of other changes so you may have more flexibility and choice. Information on how to use sensory submodalities will be added to this section in due course.
Visual - Submodes that can shift along a range:
Visual - Submodes that have alternatives:
Visual - Miscellaneous
Auditory - Submodes that can shift along a range:
Auditory - Submodes that can have alternatives:
Auditory - Miscellaneous:
Kinaesthetic - Submodalities that change
Kinaesthetic - Submodes that have alternatives:
Kinaesthetic - Miscellaneous
VESTIBULAR PREDICATES & LANGUAGE
Refer sensory submodalities for background. As the Vestibular system is the organ of body connection, it's input involves information on the bodies response to gravity, direction, spatial location, speed, acceleration, deceleration and body equilibrium.
All the senses and emotions both feed into, and interact with the Vestibular system.
Adjectives and verbs that represent whole or partial body movement may provide 'windows' for linking with Vestibular system functioning and scope for healing ways.
In some indigenous communities healers will go out to meet members who have been engaged in hunting to clear their energies before they re-enter the community - so that none of the energy of the hunt is brought back into the community and it is often vestibular elements that are reshaped for the changing of the mindbody energy and the healer will have the hunters stand as the healer moves and dances around them and with gentle touch and gesture and simple words has the softening ways return to jaw and fist and belly and the breathing.
The vestibular system's connection to all other parts of the mindbody is so profound that having a person or group of people stand as words and expressions and metaphorical movement surround them, subtle and profound changes may come within their bodies in response to gravity and the healing context. As energy, emotions, sensations, ideas and past history are embodied, so they can be changed, and the healer can use all these things in creative ways. And these micro-experiences can be woven so that even a few threads make a difference. Refer Laceweb - Healing the Mindbody for a more details on healing ways using the mindbody.
Also refer Regaining Balance Through Mutual-help.
Spatial location predicates
Body equilibrium predicates
Words effecting the Vestibular system
We can be clear about enabling the resolving of another's wellbeing issues if we make a clear distinction between what is our 'stuff' and what is their 'stuff' and then working with them on their stuff. Refer projections (*).
In some contexts you may want to work on both your stuff and your partners stuff. The suggestion is, don't confuse the two. Merging with and modelling your partner's 'micro-experiences and abilities is an excellent way to learn new micro-experiences. Refer calibrating (*).
Various tasks seem to require a particular level of 'generalised arousal' for peak performance. By 'arousal' we mean things like energy level, alertness, and focused attention on the task. Refer Strategies for Arousal Flexibility (*) for a detailed resources.
Internally, it's the relative activity between the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems within the autonomic nervous system (*). The Sympathetic system prepares for action. The Parasympathetic system prepares for rest and rumination. As well it is the relative balance levels between the ergotropic and the trophotropic systems. Refer the associated page Healing the Mindbody. Also refer liminality (*), debriefing (*) and ultradian rhythms (*).
Increase arousal and we perform better. However, any excess arousal beyond the level required for a particular task and performance deteriorates very rapidly. This means we may be effective on demanding tasks because we have the required high levels of arousal and then shift to a 'gentler task' requiring lower arousal with our arousal still high. Because of arousal in excess of what's required, this new task will be performed very poorly.
A valuable micro-experience is being able to shift arousal states to the levels appropriate for the particular task and context.
Finger fling: Bend elbows and have hands near your chest with palms out, then fling your arms away from you and fling fingers straight at last moment. Repeat a number of times.
Any action that increases alertness:
Any action that increases rhythmic tempo:
If very agitated - Flat foot stomp- involves bending legs and lowering pelvis, then with higher than normal knee rise, place foot firmly onto the ground as if stomping the ground as you walk; use a vigorous arm action. It's very energising initially and burns up excess chemicals. Do it for about two minutes and then slowly move doing deep breathing until you're down to slow breathing. Looks a bit weird, so you may want to do it where you do not attract attention.
Rapid transfer of awareness around the body
Lie flat on your back and alternatively lift your legs. Keep you legs straight and raise them only about two centimetres. Allow the leg to relax and drop, then raise the other leg. Do this alternate leg raising for about four minutes and then rest and give your body more to the floor/bed with each exhaling breath.
Lie on your back and alternate rapidly in seeing three things, hearing three things and then feeling three parts of your body. Keep rotating though this cycle for about 5 minutes and then give that up and then recall some prior pleasant experience by seeing hearing and feeling everything that happened
Have a warm glass of milk
Take a warm bath (not to hot).
Have a relaxing massage.
Massage your self
Relax tongue in the lower jaw with the tip of your tongue lightly against your lower gum.
Laceweb Action may enrich flexibility, choice, wholeness and well being. Action stays clear of anything that may disempower. Refer Helping (*) and Ethics (*). One frame that may guide Laceweb action is 'sovereignty', that is, relating to everyone as princesses or princes of the realm - relating with utmost respect.
Story - The Prince and the Hag:
'Once upon a time there was a young prince who was so bossy everyone was heartily sick of him and he couldn't wait to be king so everyone would have to do what he wanted, and he became very sick himself and all of the healers tried to heal him and he was sick to death of all this and yet he just got sicker and sicker until he thought he would die, and finally one of the healers said, 'Only the old Hag at the edge of the world can save you', so he orders them to take him to the old hag, and as they reach where she lives the healers become afraid and run away and hide and the old hag appears unto him and he says, 'Hag, I am your Prince and you have to heal me, for I fear I will die', and the old hag says, I will obey you this time, but on one condition - you have to marry me first', and the Prince says, 'No way! You can't dictate to me' and he immediately feels sick unto death so he panics and half chokes as he tries to say, 'Yes' and all he can say is 'Yu'... 'Yu.... so the hag says 'Is that a 'Yes'? You will marry me?' and he nods, 'yes', and so the hag beckons the healers, who are watching from a distance, and they come and carry the prince and the hag back to the castle and when word of the marriage spreads through the kingdom all the people come to the castle to witness this strange event as they all know how scary the hag is, and so the prince and the hag are married, and when they were alone in the bridal chamber the hag turns into a beautiful young princess and the prince is overjoyed at this fairytale happening, and when he awakes in the morning he is horrified to find that his beautiful princess is once again the old hag, and she tells the prince that for twelve hours she will be a beautiful young princess and twelve the old hag, and he has a choice as to whether she is the hag during the day when his subjects can see them together, or a hag at night when they are alone together, and the prince says he has things to do and he will decide in the evening, and upon returning that night she is once again the beautiful princess, and he tells her he will decide what she is to do in the morning, and when the sun rises he again hesitates and says he will think about it during the day, and immediately he is sick unto death, and the hag says he must decide her fate now, and the prince regains his strength and ponders for a long time, and then light dawns in his face as he has had a profound insight, and the hag knows he has, and he turns to the old hag and says gently to her - it's your life - you're the princess now- you have the sovereignty - you decide what to do with your life - both now and in the future - and with that, the hag turns into a beautiful young princess, and was never a hag again.
Later that day after chatting with his Father, the King, and obtaining his eager consent, the prince and the princess went out among the people of the realm whom had been summoned to the castle, and the Prince said loudly so all could hear, 'Today, by proclamation of the King, every person of the realm shall henceforth be princess and princes of the realm together and you shall have sovereignty over your own lives - and it is told that from that day forward, travellers to that realm reported it was truly a grand privilege to stay among such people - people who treated each other with the utmost respect and with such caring and joy and who lived lives so full of fun and wellbeing, and many travellers were heard to say 'If only we can be like these.'
And the truth is anyone can.'
Softeners are used to soften sentences so that they are more passive, leaving the other person maximum scope to make decisions in their lives.
it may be
it may well be
it well may be
you may like
'Perhaps you can settle back and you may like to make yourself more comfortable and maybe cast your mind back now....'
In this context, the term strategy is used to refer to typical sensory patterns in the form of linked sequences of visual (V), auditory (A), and kinaesthetic (K) experience, (either (i) internal or (e) external).
The symbol > indicates that the prior sensory element is linked to and 'fires off' or activates the next in the sequence.
Ve > Vi/Ke > Ae > Ke > Ke
The above could be a person's 'strategy' for spider phobia. It may take a split
second to happen.
(i) Ve Sees spider
(ii) Vi Imagines spider half a metre wide in front of face
(iii) Ke simultaneous with Vi, is scared witless
(iv) Ae Screams hysterically
(v) Ke Tenses side of face and neck and solar plexus while
going into a twisted cringe
(vi) Ke Feels awful
It may seem weird that anyone would want to actually imagine a spider that is so large and to imagine that it was just about to leap on your face! It is a great way to scare the wits out of anybody. But this was what one person did do. She did it every time she saw a spider. She was not even aware that that's what she did until a very wide hand gesture was noticed by a nurturer when she was describing a spider. The nurturer was calibrating (*) just what strategy she used (the one outlined above). We could say to her, 'DONT DO THAT!' However, with her, the pattern was instantaneous. It happened before she had a chance to do anything about it. Patterns to stop this sort of thing will be added to this page in the future.
Ae > Ai > Vi > Ki > Ke > Ke > Ai >
After the Ai element, the strategy loops back to the Vi element and then proceeds through Ki, Ke, K,e and back to Ai again. Then the loop starts again. Some strategies contain loops. People who use them end up going around in circles.
Eg. The above could be a paranoia strategy.
Ae X hears someone talking
Ai X imagines they are saying bad things about X.
Vi X imagines seeing X in bad situations
Ki X imagines feeling bad
Ke X's collapses chest, shrinks, compresses spine and neck
Ke X feels depressed and 'awful'
Ai X reverts to Ai above and proceeds around loop escalating
aversive states with each loop
Laceweb experience is that a lot of people get into difficulties because they are either under or over aroused for a particular context they find themselves in.
Being too relaxed in some contexts can create issues.
Some tasks only require a low level of arousal for peak 'performance'. For example, telling bedtime stories to our young ones.
Some tasks require a moderate level of arousal. Others require for us to be very very aroused. - really sharp and 'on the ball'.
The airline pilot flies the plane into the cloud. He doesn't know that this is not an ordinary cloud. It's made of volcanic ash. In less than a minute there is a sudden eerie silence. All the jet engines have stopped! They're jammed full of ash. 38,000 feet altitude and no engines. You're the pilot and 300 plus people are relying on you! He immediately puts the jumbo into a very steep dive out of the cloud. This one is not in the books. Flying on intuition. Even steeper dive now. Almost vertically down. The stuff of fighter planes - not jumbo airliners. Air pressure blasting all jets free of ash. Scorching through 30,000, 28,000, 26,000 - the speed increasing every second. Flight remarkably smooth - eerily silent. No one making a sound. Every breath except the pilots is being held. Passing through 16,000, 14,000. Time to start easing back. No one but no one has done this manoeuvre before. Easy at first. The dive rate begins to ease. Gentle nurturing. Ease a little more now at 10,000 and still descending. Fire up all engines. All start first pop. Their insides have never been so clean. Nothing like volcanic ash to give metal a good scouring. Power adds further stability to the plane. Subtle configuration shifts allow the plane to level out at 5,500 feet. A steady calm voice is heard over the passenger cabin intercom:
'This is your Captain speaking. The rather rapid descent we have successfully made was caused by a temporary interrupt to power due to intake of volcanic ash. This has now been cleared. All engines are working beautifully! We will be keeping well clear of all clouds till our landing. Flight attendants please check that all are okay and report to me. This event is deeply regretted.'
Spontaneous applause breaks out throughout the cabin.
Extreme task - very high levels of arousal for peak performance. Extremely alert, focused and yet calm. If that pilot had a few degrees of arousal in excess of that required, he would have been useless. Panic, confusion and overload completely destroys effectiveness.
One thing that appears very clear. Any excess arousal beyond what is required for a particular task and the level of our performance on that task declines rapidly.
Often people are very effective in tasks requiring a lot of arousal and then they revert to other tasks that only need lower levels of arousal. The problem is that their arousal levels are still very high from the previous tasks. The result - they perform these new, somewhat simple tasks, very poorly. For example, the person who has been very effective in high powered negotiations with major issues at stake, who comes home to a slower pace and is so full of adrenalin and 'fast twitch', that everything annoys and irritates. Sound familiar?
An important thing then, is having the ability to raise or lower our awareness whenever we need to!
Other people may have high levels of arousal jammed in place because of trauma. Their body rages. Thoughts race. They are tight everywhere. It's like having the accelerator and the hand brake on at the same time.
Every now and then their body's 'speed up' systems 'pack it in' and the body spontaneously switches to profound low arousal and lethargy with the cessation of will and resolve. After a time the adrenalin starts to 'kick in' and the cycle begins again.
To break this vicious cycle an important thing is having the ability to raise or lower our awareness whenever we need to!
The autonomic nervous system (*) is particularly involved in shifting arousal level. It is made up of the sympathetic system for increasing arousal and the parasympathetic system for lowering arousal. These systems are profoundly linked. Typically an increase in one system sets off a decrease in the other.
Each of these two systems tend to be 'state dependant' (*). That is, they have a particular mix of internal juices present in the system while in their various stages of activation. Many of the following processes for shifting arousal work by 'putting the juices back into storage'. This allows the two systems to more readily shift. This is why many of the processes may allow you to either increase or decrease arousal as appropriate to context. To put it another way - rather than raising or lowering arousal directly, some of the processes allow you to more easily change to be how you want to be.
There is a measure of overlap and replication in the following list as everything is pervasively interrelated.
STRATEGIES FOR INCREASING AND DECREASING AROUSAL
The following is a list of things everyone can do to increase or reduce the level of their physical arousal. Share them with your friends and acquaintances. If there are other things that work for you, you may like to let us know so we can put them up on this page for others to use.
These suggestions may make you very sleepy, so keep a reality anchor going (*) or have some one wake you or set an alarm clock if necessary.
MOVEMENT PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL:
BODY PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL:
§ Notice any bending, twisting and comprehension (shrinking) of the spine and shift to sitting or walking with easy length.
BODY PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL:
Others, wanting it to be very personal have selected coded expressions using colours, such as 'greening' or 'pinking' to mean say 'forgiving', so only they know its special meaning. Hearing both your key word and name being chanted all around you while experiencing the laying on of hands can be a profound healing nurturing experience!
BREATHING PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL
LANGUAGE PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL
SENSORY PROCESSES FOR LOWERING AROUSAL
MOVEMENT PROCESSES FOR INCREASING AROUSAL:
BODY PROCESSES FOR INCREASING AROUSAL:
BREATHING PROCESSES FOR RAISING AROUSAL
SENSORY PROCESSES FOR RAISING AROUSAL
LANGUAGE PROCESSES FOR RAISING AROUSAL
The follow is a list of possible entry points for shifting emotional states.
When two sensory experiences have been linked so that if the first one is ever activated, the second is automatically fired off simultaneously. Refer example 1 in 'Strategies and Loops' (*) and Flare Concepts (*)
People go through a ninety minute cycle. For the last fifteen minutes or so they shift to a quieter phase. Typically the person alters the brain hemisphere to their least used for this quieter phase. The nervous system tends to quieten. Their is a shift from sympathetic to parasympathetic activation. Refer Shifting arousal states (*), debriefing (*) and liminal (*).
People tend to more easily go into everyday trance states (*) during these breaks. Healers can be aware of people's rhythms and match healing processes to appropriate phases. For example, during an active phase (i) use language metamodel to specify peoples maps, have them generating options and exploring and using micro-experiences. Use passive stage to explore (i) healing in everyday trance states, being relaxed and quiet, giving suggestions, having then work in downtime (*) and the like.
V (visual), A (auditory), K (kinaesthetic - feeling, somatic (body) sensation, emotion and movement).
VAK refers to the three senses V visual, A auditory and K kinaesthetic. For a large part of their behaviour people use their senses in habitual patterns. It is possible to identify these patterns, to add to them and modify them for increasing flexibility and choice. Refer anchoring (*), calibrating (*), sensory submodalities (*) and strategies & loops (*).
Wellbeing implies wholeness - being well. Enriching well being is a generative action. Wellbeing includes well being in all it's forms:
and includes merging with the well being of the Earth and all life forms
All these aspects of being well may emerge from self help action.
Also refer Accessing Wellness
Experience has shown that rich functional strategies (*) include visual, auditory, and kinaesthetic (VAK) (*) components and always end in an element linked to the external world. This enables the person to finish in everyday related focus and to varying degrees 'grounded'. We are not left dissociated (*) in internal experience.
Also refer Laceweb Concepts and Frames
(These are essentially in alphabetical order)
The following material is a partial and annotated list of micro-frames used within the Laceweb. The concept 'frame' is used in the sense of a border or edge, something setting something apart, creating a place and or context, something helping constitute meaning and ways of looking, hearing, seeing, feeling and savouring. The term 'micro' implies 'a bit of the whole'.
The concepts and ideas contained herein are massively interconnected and linked - just like the Laceweb itself.
The Laceweb is not an organisation. It is more an informal network or matrix. The word matrix has the following meanings:
'A womb; a place where anything is generated or developed; the formative part from which a structure is produced; intercellular substance; a mold, type or die in which anything is cast or shaped.'
In talking about the Laceweb, people may refer to, for example, The NELPS LACEWEBS. No specific organisation is being referred to. Rather, it is the focus or function of the action. The term 'functional matrix’ (*) is used to refer to the generative and formative developing and shaping of functions, fields or foci of Laceweb action.
The Laceweb uses a number of terms as a focus of action. The list below is not exhaustive, and there is overlap between categories. The terms used are in bold and the functions and foci of each term are in lower case:
As outlined in a Laceweb communiqué, wellbeing foci within the SE Asia, Australia, Pacific region are:
No other energy/group/organisation/movement has been found that is doing 'Laceweb' action, e.g. enabling local indigenous self-help and the passing of 'what works' on to other indigenous groups and linking all of this to supportive humane elements of both the 'alternative' and the 'mainstream'. Some of the typical behaviours are outlined in Laceweb - Self-Help Action Supporting Survivors of Torture and Trauma in Se Asia, Oceania and Australasia - Small Generalisable Actions
Guidelines and experiences to assist in innervating and synthesising this Laceweb action are the models developed by Norwegian mediators in the Palestinian/Jewish rapprochement and the Truth and Reconciliation process in South Africa, though not simply applied. Rather, the emphasis of grassroots gatherings in private, supportive enablings in order that differences may be mediated - and not be used to differentiate - are a key feature of those models that may be used in the Laceweb.
Material on Key Indigenous Issues is found in the Laceweb Auspicing Motion section.
Local Laceweb action starts with one or more people taking action to resolve aspects of their own wellbeing. This action is based on local knowings and wisdoms. Actions that work are repeated. Actions that don't work are modified so they do work, or are dropped.
In mainstream, typically, research precedes and guides action. Within the Laceweb, the reverse happens - locals act and the results are evaluated using local criteria - hence the term 'action research'. Locals already have the local wisdom and the local knowings. They do not need to research to find it. Wisdom and knowings both guide action and provide a frame (*) for evaluating. Action research may complement mainstream research by demonstrating what does not work so research energies may be concentrated on refining existing effective action. Refer 'self help action' and active self organising processes (*).
Organic systems in nature tend to be active self organising processes. For example, because rain that has fallen at the head of the valley has already made a groove in the ground, further rain falling randomly in the same area is more likely to run into and down the same groove. This makes it wider and deeper and more likely to be 'used' again by randomly falling rain. This and similar grooves create a self organising system collecting water at the Keypoint.
Similarly, self help action is organic. It involves a self organising process. No one is 'in charge'. Everyone involved makes inputs. It's closer to say, 'Everyone is in charge'. It is local and lateral (*). The 'local' links with other 'locals' in a flat web-like process. Like the 'groove', what works tends to be repeated and deepened/ strengthened in the process.
Mainstream folk tend to think nothing will happen unless some 'manager' organises it - unless some superior tells subordinates what to do. They also tend to be 'blind' to the massive self organising that goes on all around them in nature. Laceweb action is natural.
Laceweb action evolves into the repeating of that which works. It is the survival of the fitting. (Refer 'self help action (*) and 'active self organising systems' (*).) This allows 'that which does not fit - that is, anomalies, to stand out and be a focus of attending and action. Anomalies are situated, that is, in this particular time and space - in this context (*). They are 'differences that may make a difference', so we may have to try something different to resolve them. If they are positive anomalies, we may celebrate them. Refer celebrating diversity (*).
Beliefs and Guides to Action
Laceweb action has evolved completely separate and independent of any religious or political group, or systems of metaphysical beliefs. Laceweb beliefs and principles are a few and simple. The following examples are part of the oral tradition of the Laceweb. The authors have heard them repeated over and over by Laceweb people. They tend to be woven into conversations. They are used to frame (*) contexts (*) and places (*)
This underlying simplicity enables and eases the osmosis and absorption of the Laceweb between cultures and spiritual systems. For example, imagine cautious and sceptical Bougainville people suddenly having support offered that involved taking on board North American Indian or Mayan Cosmologies as part of the package. In contrast, all that's there from Laceweb enablers (*) are simple healing patterns that work. 'Try what you want. Change it round. See if it fits. See if it works for you'. Simple!
Refer 'Transforming' (*).
Places (*) and contexts (*) may have an edge or boundary. It may be as natural as in a ring of trees, the circle made by a ring of bodies sitting in a circle, the light of the night fire - with darkness beyond. The edge may be the shadow cast by the overhead tarp. It may be festive or ceremonial-like pieces of ribbon. It may be the walls of a room or the bend in the river. The boundary can mark out the beginning and end of the place (*) of the context (*), a 'place rich with possibilities'. This is where X is to happen. It helps set a frame (*).
The beginning and end of contexts (*) and places (*) may be constituted in part by boundary making (*). Boundaries may be marked. The frame (*) around the cartoon marks out the cartoon reality. Snoopy the cartoon character doesn't run onto the finance pages. He stays within the cartoon frame. The white line marks the edge of the cricket field; the drier grass marks out the cricket pitch. The rise and fall of the curtain marks the beginning and end of the play reality. Healing contexts may be in part constituted by marking the boundary - the shade of this tree and especially this space between us.
Caring for Carer
Nurturing may drain energy and be very wearing. A strong sense of personal safety may allow us to pace ourselves and monitor our resourcefulness, energy levels and indicators of stress (eg. check breathing).
Ethical concerns also call for withdrawing support when our own capacity to be of help is very low to the point of not been helpful to the other. There is virtue in developing and calling upon a support network who may monitor fellow carers.
People from different cultures live in very different realities (refer intercultural realities). The differences between 'them' and 'us' are such that when we share space - both 'them' and 'us' together- it is possible for both peoples to enter and share a very different 'shared reality' that both groups play a part in constituting and constructing. And we both bring our differences into this novel reality. And we may explore and celebrate this profound novelty. Refining our sensitivities and sensibilities in this new reality may extend awareness that we all share differing realities and this difference may be celebrated.
Consensual Validating of What Works
Laceweb actions that work may be shared with others. This enriches the Laceweb and provides scope for consensual validating.
Laceweb action takes place (*) as we go about our everyday lives. It takes place 'in context'. Contrast mainstream healing which almost invariable takes place 'out of context'. For example, in some mainstream medical practices, only one person at a time can see a doctor. This makes whole family consultation within the home, impossible.
Within the Laceweb, healing contexts are sometimes created. Some contexts are reframed to be healing contexts. Refer Anomalies (*), Beliefs and Guides to Action (*), Emergent Properties (*), Enabling (*), Frame (*) Ebb and Flow (*) and Place (*).
The word 'destiny' comes from the Latin 'destino', meaning 'outcome of the weaving'. Laceweb people actively weave and evolve wellbeing realities together.' Implicit in self help action is the notion that society is 'socially constructed' Also implicit, the notion that people simultaneously produce social reality and are the products of that social reality. These three notions tend to be expressed within the Laceweb using organic and ludic or playful metaphors:
'In taking action together to organically unfold and evolve our wellbeing, we are reshaping and evolving ourselves in response to other players.' (Laceweb hand-out).
The Laceweb process is inherently empowering. Self starters take action to find other self starters or go it alone and demonstrate to sceptics by results. Others join in, and together, they create futures. Refer functional matrix (*).
From the outset, Neville Yeomans and others found that mainstream people and organisations, both public and private, were very threatened by Laceweb Action. To quote from a Laceweb Paper to the Rural Health Support, Education and Training Unit (RHSET) in the Health Department in Canberra:
'Traditional government and non government wellbeing agencies may see grassroots initiatives as a threat to their own funding. If grassroots wellbeing action really starts to be effective on a larger scale, this may raise a fear of presupposed down-sizing within sections of the bureaucracy and a similar fear within traditional wellbeing services. Because of these perceived threats, the foregoing entities may mistakenly seek to undermine grassroots wellbeing initiatives.
They may fail to see scope for multiple lateral integration between bottom-up and top down processes, or appreciate the scope for shifting from vertical integration to lateral integration. The obvious claim from within the existing paradigm is that grassroots wellbeing action is 'unprofessional' - that is, it is not under the direction and control of professed experts. Also, that it is not organised 'properly' - in other words, it is not top down (Yeomans, N., et al, 1995).
The above paper was prepared to allow Canberra people some understanding why the Laceweb would not accept government funding mooted as been 'big dollars'.
In South East Asian countries, the last thing transnationals and governments would want is for indigenous people and small minorities to increase their effectiveness in resolving their own wellbeing and sharing what works with each other.
In response to this hostile climate, extensive Laceweb processes may be set up to 'protect' and 'deflect'. One simple and effective process referred to elsewhere in this paper is to have action take place (*) and grow in very remote places outside of 'dominant' people's notice. Often sabotage of Laceweb action comes from local indigenous and small minority people who have adopted the ways of the dominant culture and have become better at being 'top down control managers' than those of the dominant society.
'Making links for the first time with indigenous people may be very tricky. Indigenous people tend to live in a very tricky world. In some indigenous contexts (*) mothers may tell their children one thing and then do something totally different. They then say 'tricked you'. Children soon learn that 'life is tricky'. For them, it is! Things are not what they seem. Additionally, people are both cautious of outsiders and sick of destructive outside experts. In this context, finding the local natural nurturers may be very difficult. Often people may put out a 'strong pitch' for what you 'want' so they can get personal advantage. They may have no 'wellbeing' and 'the good of the whole' focus. Enablers (*) use the anthropological processes 'immersion' and 'dialogue' as well as an extensive set of micro micro-experiences and frames like those outlined in this material to make links. (Interview with member of the Laceweb).
It must be said that a lot of attempts at enabling (*) 'go hopelessly off the rails' for all sorts of reasons that can be specified. When it does, life may be very emotionally wearing for enablers (*) Refer Developing Aboriginal and Torres strait Islander Drug and Substance Abuse Therapeutic Communities for some examples.
The social life-world - individuals, families and communities - are eco-systems. Everything is linked and related. There is organic unfolding (*), osmosis, symbiosis, synergy, self organising (*), all with emergent properties (*) and nodes (*) (where a lot of links take place). Individuals are typically richly linked to significant others who are part of presenting issues. Healing action allows for this. Eco-system metaphors are used throughout Laceweb action.
Laceweb action has many of the characteristics of other organic eco-systems - refer organic unfolding (*) and active self organising systems (*). One characteristic is that new aspects, innovations, as well as novel and exquisite appropriateness 'emerge', often spontaneously, from the organic unfolding (*) of possibilities. Laceweb action fosters the emergence of wellbeing.
Refer Emergent Properties in Laceweb Concepts and Frames.
Enriched places (*), contexts (*), and frames (*) are brim full of possibilities - they have emergent properties (*) or aspects that foster the likelihood of emergence. 'Enriching', plants seeds of possibilities (seeding).
'Enablers' as the name suggests 'enable'. That is, they endeavour to create the physical and psycho-social context (*), frame (*), and climate within the person or group that maximises the local(s)' capacity for personal and group empowerment. There may be increased possibilities for extending their abilities, in making effective responses, and in taking cooperative and effective action to enrich their wellbeing together - self help.
Local 'self starters' may invite Laceweb enablers from other areas to share ways to evolve the Laceweb in a local area - particularly if referred by their friends. Locals may also invite enablers to share healing ways that work.
Alternatively, enablers may create contexts (*) whereby they may identify local nurturing types and introduce these to each other. Laceweb notions may be seeded.
Local indigenous and small minority people may initially be very cautious and sceptical about Laceweb enablers. Projections abound. They have had a life time of people offering unhelpful help - and many are heartily sick of them. Often local nurturers may be part of the Laceweb for some time before the wider implications and breadth of Laceweb action dawns on them. Finding out the richness and implications of the Laceweb before being 'ready' for it may overwhelm some people and have them withdraw.
Learning about the Laceweb may be an organic unfolding (*). Neville Yeomans started passing on important bits of information about the Laceweb to others - things that happened 30 or more years ago; presumably, the time was now right for others to know!
Laceweb enablers pass on some 'enabler information' on a 'need to know' basis. For example, Let's say an enabler X built up a trusting relationship with a small group in a remote area in Asia - people whom their own government want dead or in prison. For enabler Y to suddenly contact this remote group saying he or she was referred by X would likely result in the group severing all ties with X.
The authors have known some Laceweb enablers for over 15 years - enablers who have very extensive networks right through SE Asia. And these have never mentioned a single link to the author. He doesn't need to know! And yet bits of these networks link closely with other enabler's networks. And as it seems 'right', further links are made. And there are common understandings among enablers that their name and work is not to be passed on to anyone without their clearance.
Enablers rigorously refrain from taking or accepting 'the expert' role. Typically some locals may initially view enablers as 'expert'. However enablers take every opportunity to 'enable' people to engage in self help (*).
Typically, some different healing ways may be passed on to each of a few local nurturers. Then these nurturers may be encouraged to pass their micro-experiences on to each other. This allows the possibility firstly for the micro-experiences to be 'filtered' through the local cultural and healing ways, and secondly, for the locals (rather than the enabler) to be the major source for the passing on of new micro-experiences to each other. The enabler remains in the background as 'enabler' rather than 'on high' as 'fountain of all wisdom'.
A context (*) may be set up that may rich with possibilities. Everyday life may be, for small moments or perhaps for a long time, 'enriched' - framed as healing wellbeing - as joyful, light - the healing power of playfulness and laughter - or spiritual - a glance - a smile - for perhaps a few hours - marked out - a boundary - and a beautiful setting with flowers and the setting sun.
Frame - a border, edge, setting something apart, creating a space, place (*) and/or context (*), helping meaning and ways of looking, hearing, seeing, feeling and savouring. A frame 'sets off' and enriches a painting - A frame may put a 'boundary'(*) on a context (*) - as a context of a 'particular kind' - this is what is going on - this is the 'definition of the situation'. A frame may assist in clarifying the meaning of behaviour. For example, a person sees another jumping around outside in a 'crazy' fashion - clutching his shirt. Having the additional piece of information that a poisonous spider has fallen down that person's shirt 'frames' what's going on, or reframes (*) 'crazy' into 'self care'. Framing and reframing may be extensively used in healing.
Frame - Frame Making
Frames may be 'set up' or 'made' in many ways.
By using signs as markers and signifiers, eg. putting up sign at a festival:
'Laceweb workshops are to be held here each morning at 10AM.'
By using verbal and non verbal behaviours, eg. by simply saying 'X' is what is happening or using the language of assuming, possibilities, presupposing, implying, and arousing curiosity.
After meeting an acquaintance on a bush track, saying:
'I met a friend of mine who showed me a simple way she uses to lift herself when she gets very depressed and I tried it and it works wonders in a couple of minutes and you may want to use it and pass it on to your friends okay? Its as simple as this......'
Frame - Metaframing
The 'weekend camp-out' frame
'nurturer development' frame
'enabler development' frame
'Laceweb development' frame.
Laceweb action holistically addresses all aspects of wellbeing (*) as part of an eco-system. A sample of Laceweb functions and foci is contained above in the section 'functional matrix' (*) and the Laceweb Timeline (*). Action tends to address holistically all aspects of wellbeing. Actions integrate various functions and foci, for example the aged, the disabled, youth, single mothers, and families may be all jointly explored.
This contrasts with mainstream which tends to divide the world up into big chunks like, health, housing, family services and social services. These chunks are further divided into sectors like, children, aged, disabled. Typically, there is no inter-sector funding or cooperation and no inter-'big chunk' funding or cooperation.
Ebb and Flow
A Yolngu concept drawn from the ebb and flow of the tide. The Yolngu are Arnhem Land Aborigines from Northern Australia. In social, and particularly therapeutic and relational mediating contexts (*), it may be appropriate to slowly withdraw (ebb) from interacting and then at an appropriate moment begin to flow back again (flow). Enablers and nurturers may have a series of these ebbs and flows as appropriate to context - like peeling layers of an onion. Heal a bit and recede and then return again. This process may be very useful in relational mediating. Where projected anger about past outrage unrelated to the Laceweb has skewed local's perceptions of enablers, sometimes years may pass before some Laceweb links are resumed (As an example see Report to NACADA, 1993).
Over time this page may be filled with practical ways to be a healing support for yourself and others. There may be ways for you to further increase your flexibility and choice.
You may have experienced that some types of help may not be helpful. Some people, in all sorts of subtle and not so subtle ways, start 'help' by attempting to take over and 'run' the other person's life for them:
Unhelpful helpers also tend to tell the other person to tell absent third parties what to do or not do - an even more tenuous and problematic undertaking. All of the forgoing is almost invariably not helpful. Furthermore, it may be disempowering to both the 'helper' and the other.
People often play at being weak and helpless so that they may get others to rush in and 'help them'. They may in fact be very skilful and manipulative. Unhelpful help also lays the 'helper' open to being manipulated by the receiver of the 'help'. The 'helpless' person may begin to present with a continual need for 'help', while also making inappropriate requests for help and then blaming the 'helper' for things going wrong.
Other: 'I tried what you said and it made it worse.'
(The implication is 'so fix it for me'.)
Other: 'So what should I do now?'
People, while sharing aspects of a specific cultural reality, may live in differing personal realities. The Yolngu Aborigines from Northern Australia, over the past 300 or more years, have recognised that visitors from SE Asian countries brought their reality with them. And yet, their presence among the Yolngu created a new shared reality that was a never ending source of wonder which was celebrated with their visitors in song, story and dance during their visitors stay. Refer 'celebrating diversity (*) and 'anomalies' (*)
From 'limin' (Latin) meaning the threshold, the last step before the entrance. 'Liminal' experience is 'at the threshold' - being open to change - a turning point. Staying and 'working at the threshold' is to stay in liminality. The steps that lead up to the limin are preliminary.
Being 'liminal' may have the feeling of 'safe abandoning' of the old - to safely surrender to the 'moment' as in 'small amount of time' and turning power. It may embody the shift from ordinary reality to dissociating and trance in increased awareness of awareness.
Enablers (*) may set up liminal contexts (*) and liminal spaces. People in liminal states may be for the time 'threshold people'. Their attributes are necessarily ambiguous. This is because the condition of 'liminality' and being a 'liminal person' elude or slip through normal classifyings that locate places and positions in social space. 'Liminal people' are neither here nor there; they are betwixt and between the normal. Liminal states are enriched with possibilities.
The ambiguous and indeterminate attributes of liminality may be expressed in rich metaphors and symbols such as being invisible, being in darkness, being in the womb, being in the wilderness, metamorphosis, forgetting, floating, drifting, the light at the end of the tunnel, the dawning, the new dawn, flying, and as one person characterised it, the merging together the following three metaphors:
Laceweb action may be both local and laterally linked in a functional matrix (*). This action can complement both top down and bottom up approaches of more mainstream non government organisations (NGO's), community based organisations (CBO's) and government bodies.
The Laceweb has been collecting, evolving and refining healing processes since its early beginnings. 'What works' is a criteria. Most have simple elements or micro-experiences. These have been drawn globally from indigenous and small minority people as well as mainstream. One attempt at collating these micro-experiences has over 400 big chunks made up of over 6,000 small micro-experiences The Laceweb - Frames and Micro-experiences for the Next Thousand Years - link in preparation).
Nexus Groups is a not-for-profit charity registered in NSW Australia in the early 1970's by Laceweb people. It was created to be both functionally useful in the prevailing contexts (*) as well as a time capsule that could be ready to be used 30 or more years in the future.
Nexus Groups started out being called 'Connexion' (refer 'functional matrix' (*). Shortly thereafter it changed to Nexus Groups. For a number of months in the early 1970's, Connexion published the 'Aboriginal Human Relations' Magazine that reported on community healing action among the Aboriginal community in Australia. Nexus Groups continues as a registered entity and has not received or spent a 'cent' for over 20 years.
Nexus Groups has no connection with the magazine 'Nexus' sold in some newsagents and alternative shops, nor connection with 'Nexus Cyber Community' on the Internet.
Nodes are central points of a system where many 'pathways' or energies intersect. Within the three dimensional webwork of the Laceweb (refer functional matrix (*) there are a number of nodal points - individuals, small groups and communities which are centres for energy and the flow of wisdoms. Nodes have links to a number of other parts of the Laceweb.
Order/Chaos - Random With Constraints
Some mainstream people tend to think of 'chaos' as a 'complete mess'. Laceweb action is chaotic. The essence of chaos is randomness with constraints - the constraints of the context (*) and system.
Chaos tends towards order. Chaos often unfolds into things of great beauty, design and symmetry. Chaos may be self organising (*) and have emergent properties (*). For example the random build up of calcium deposits on the sea-shell is constrained by being only able to attach along the exposed edge. The shell-fish can only enlarge the shell's opening in constrained ways. This constrained randomness builds to make the wonderful spiralling sea-shells.
Laceweb action may be a function of local energy at any one place (*). It may be randomly self organising and it's liminal (*) action may have emergent properties (*) which may be sustained by the random acts of local nurturers and enablers (*), and which may constrained by factors and anomalies present in situated contexts (*) and within their lives.
Laceweb action happens because the energy is there for it. It is not managed. It is chaotic (*). It is not planned, staffed, directed or controlled by top-down processes.
Typically, it does not result from any 'decision making process'. Rather, one or more people mull over the state of wellbeing - they are familiar with the issues. Ideas emerge and action commences because it starts to make sense to do it. If the energy is there from others, then these others join in. Actions unfold - like a flower bud opening.
Anywhere, indoors or out, may become recognised as a 'place' for a few moments or long term. Places may have meaning and memories attached. They may move inside of us. We may re-member them. Places may become enriched. People may sense possibilities. Places may be framed (*). Often the 'particular' more than the 'general' happens there. 'This is where we 'X'.'
Places tend to have associated contexts (*). 'This is the place Tim began walking again.' 'This is where we had our first enablers (*) gathering.' We may chance to meet on the trail and may take the time to offer a sharing of healing ways. This may briefly change the context. In this interchange, wellbeing may be transformed.
If so, this bit of trail may become a special place in time and space. It may become our special place - where we are sharing enrichment. It may become a long re-membered place. The experience contained within it may be inside of us.
Place - Becoming Familiar
Becoming familiar with a place. We may walk in uptime, where all of our senses are external (not internal in our mind), attending to a place and its surroundings such that we 'take in' the landscape and all of its features - we internalise it - we have the landscape inside of us - it becomes a part of us. Anything that happens at this place enriches our familiarity. The place becomes a natural anchor for re-entering into memories and resource states that we have experienced at this place. Similarly, by imaging we are back at this place the same thing may happen - we may find that we can re-enter into states of being and resources like we did the first time and do it easily.
A music string is vibrated and a similar string nearby begins to resonate in accord. Laceweb action resonates with local healing ways. This is often not initially perceived by locals who, in filtering 'Laceweb action by outsiders' through their own preconceptions of 'outsiders', may not see the resonance. Any reference by Laceweb people to this resonance may be seen by some locals as an attempt at 'appropriation' - something spurned within the Laceweb. Refer Enabling (*) and Functional Matrix (*) and Transforming (*).
The body's receptors resonate. Receptors allow the entrance of information carrying chemicals and other interactive chemicals that have similar resonance. It seems that healers may increase the receptivity of receptors.
People from different cultures are different - often living in profoundly different realities - so different that there is a complete break or rupture between us. This break may be recognised and respected as a positive and enriching energy. Refer 'celebrating diversity' (*), and anomalies (*).
Self Help Action
Laceweb action is 'self help'. This may be contrasted with help through 'service delivery' where things are done for people. Governments, non government organisations (NGO's), and community based organisations (CBO's) pervasively use the 'service delivery' approach.
'Self help', as the term implies - is people taking action together to resolve aspects of their own wellbeing. They gain micro-experiences in the process. What works tends to be repeated and passed on to others to use. In this way action may be consensually validated. What works becomes 'policy' and policy 'works'. This contrasts with mainstream where some outside experts, pay lip service to the idea of 'helping locals help themselves'. They speak of giving locals a 'sense of participation' and give meaning to their use of 'sense' by tightly researching, designing, implementing, controlling and evaluating every aspect of what happens according to their own criteria.
Laceweb action may enrich flexibility, choice and wellbeing. Laceweb beliefs guide action (refer beliefs and guides to action (*)). A central aspect is the profound respect for the autonomy of the other. All relating and all healing ways respects this. Anything short of this standard can be disempowering for the other. It is as if everyone is a princess or prince of the realm - we relate to all with utmost respect
Story - The Prince and the Hag:
'Once upon a time there was a young prince who was so bossy everyone was heartily sick of him and he couldn't wait to be king so everyone would have to do what he wanted, and he became very sick himself and all of the healers tried to heal him and he was sick to death of all this and yet he just got sicker and sicker until he thought he would die, and finally one of the healers said, 'Only the old Hag at the edge of the world may save you', so he ordered them to take him to the old hag, and when they reached where she lived the healers became afraid and ran away and hid and the old hag appeared unto him and he said, 'Hag, I am your Prince and you have to heal me, for I fear I will die', and the old hag said, I will obey you this time, but on one condition - you have to marry me first', and the Prince said, 'No way! You can't dictate to me' and he immediately felt sick unto death so he panicked and half choked as he said, 'yes', and so the hag beckons the healers, who are watching from a distance, and they come and carry the prince and the hag back to the castle and when word of the marriage spreads through the kingdom all the people come to the castle to witness this strange event as they all know how scary the hag is, and so the prince and the hag are married, and when they are alone in the bridal chamber the hag turns into a beautiful young princess and the prince is overjoyed at this fairytale happening, and when he awakes in the morning he is horrified to find that his beautiful princess is once again the old hag, and she tells the prince that for twelve hours she will be a beautiful young princess and twelve the old hag, and he has a choice as to whether she is the hag during the day when his subjects may see them together, or a hag at night when they are alone together, and the prince says he has things to do and he will decide in the evening, and upon returning that night she is once again the beautiful princess, and he tells her he will decide what she is to do in the morning, and when the sun rises he again hesitates and says he will think about it during the day, and immediately he is sick unto death, and the hag says, 'You must decide my fate now, and the prince regains his strength and ponders for a long time, and then light dawns in his face as he has had a profound insight, and the hag knows he has, and he turns to the old hag and says gently to her - it's your life - you are the princess now- you have the sovereignty - you decide what to do with your life - both now and in the future - and with that, the hag turns into a beautiful young princess, and is never a hag again.
Later that day after chatting with his Father, the King, and obtaining his eager consent, the prince and the princess go out among the people of the realm whom had been summoned to the castle, and the Prince says loudly so all can hear, 'Today, by proclamation of the King, every person of the realm shall henceforth be princess and princes of the realm together and you shall have sovereignty over your own lives - and it is told that from that day forward, travellers to that realm reported it was truly a grand privilege to stay among such people - people who treat each other with the utmost respect and with such caring and joy and who live lives so full of fun and wellbeing, and many travellers are heard to say 'If only we can be like these.'
And the truth is anyone can!
Tentative words like 'may' are extensively used within these pages and the Laceweb. This reflects the tentative fragile nature of wellbeing action. Things may happen. Very often they don't. Often forty or fifty possibilities are 'floating around'. One or two start to happen and it appears a miracle. At other times, thousands of little and big miracles abound.
Neville Yeoman (refer Laceweb Time Line (*)) pioneered the concept 'therapeutic community' in Australia. Both dispersed and settled communities may enter into a therapeutic frame (*). Many of the processes that may help evolve these communities and enable healing within them are embraced by these notes.
The Together Approach is simultaneously a way of being and a way of acting. It derives derives from the central Australian Aboriginals. It is the nurturing mother - Earth. It is universal in the sense that it in derives from 'embody' and 'in the mother'. It is communal nurturing together - the healing caring gentle mothering energy of the community-on-the-land. It is both strong and soft - always respectful. It is nurturing well being together - an ever respectful, caring, joyous, playful, celebratory nurturing. With this approach, together is abundantly special.
Track, Neighbourhood, Bush Camp and In Situ Counselling
Laceweb healing action 'takes place' (*) in context (*). And the place may be anywhere - on a mountain track, around the local neighbourhood, while sitting in the bush or on the beach. And it may happen again, in situ - in its original place - or at another place. It may be planned or spontaneous. It may take place in a moment - like the healing power of a smile - or extend for days.
Transducing - Changing Energy Form
'Transducing' means changing energy from one form into another. For example the windmill turns wind power into energy for pumping water.
The processes outlined herein may transform energy and channel it into wellbeing and healing acts. The energy generated, bottled and consumed in resentment and anger may be transduced into passion for wellbeing action.
Laceweb enablers (*) may introduce to locals 'processes that work' passed on to them by Laceweb people from other localities. All acceptable processes coming into a local area may be transformed in order to be integrated with the local healing ways. Local nurturers may grow firstly in sensing the transformational possibilities of desired processes, and secondly, in their ability to effect those transformings. These transforming processes mitigate against the idea that 'our stuff' should be used by everybody (ethno-centric universalism).
Using Local Knowings and Practical Wisdoms
Typically, locals have a massive quantity of local knowings tempered with local practical wisdom. Action may be based on these wisdoms and knowings, and possibly supported by self-help actions that have worked elsewhere.
Using 'What Works'
Locals take action. Some things work - others do not. What works tends to be used again and passed on to others.
Laceweb action extends to include wellbeing in all its forms including communal, economic, emotional, family, habitat, physical, psycho-social and spiritual wellbeing (refer functional matrix (*). It goes way beyond the typical focus of most Permaculture projects which tend to hone in on agricultural and environmental wellbeing.
LIST OF FURTHER MICRO-EXPERIENCES
SECTION UNDER CONSTRUCTION
Material is being prepared under the following sub-headings:
Wr (Use 'Any Damn Thing With Respect')
Living – Mini Awareness Experiences for transforming from existing to Living